Newbie with wide-open eyes!

[Diet Coke]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Thursday wasn't successful. Didn't even try.
Still working on vitamins....that's overwhelming....all at specific times. I really need to exercise too. Slept until noon, very exhausted. I think all this is adding stress...luckily i'm not a stress drinker.

[sapphire1]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

FreedGenie;966773 wrote: Hi Sapphire, thanks for stopping by x
I now have a streaming cold. The headache has gone but I feel tired and coldy - blurghh. I have lit a nice fire and just had a nice cup of tea which made me feel a bit better.
I got offered a glass of bubby twice today. Needless to say I declined!
I had an email from my friend who is so happy it's Friday so she can drink as she's been abstaining all week. This is exactly why I am doing the 30. I don't want to associate Fridays (or any other day) with drinking anymore. I want to just drink on special occassions after the 30AFdays.
I have to say, it is nice having warm drinks on a cold, rainy evening. I never used to drink a warm drink after about 4pm!
Have a nice Friday. xx

Hi Freed,


Its actually Saturday in Australia, but I will have a good day. Yes nice warm drinks near the fire sound divine It is a simple pleasure that we forget about when we are drinking. Trying to break that association between the day of the week (Friday) and drinking is a good way to go...its another trigger out of the way. When al starts losing its grip and we begin to feel like we are finally captain of our own ship, it is the most amazing thing. Stay well and have a fantastic weekend. xx

[sapphire1]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Diet Coke;967025 wrote: Thursday wasn't successful. Didn't even try.
Still working on vitamins....that's overwhelming....all at specific times. I really need to exercise too. Slept until noon, very exhausted. I think all this is adding stress...luckily i'm not a stress drinker.

DC dont feel too bad about your Thursday. Its early days and it can be overwhelming. Maybe you could go for a walk to clear your head and relax a little. Its one step at a time and noone ever gets it right first up. The fact that you are trying is enough for now...well done. Keep reminding yourself that you are doing well and that you will find some days easier than others. Sending you strength....have a great day:l

[FreedGenie]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Hi Sapphire
I agree that you forget about the simple pleasures in life when you drink. Even when there here was snow on the ground outside, I would still drink icecold spritzers - in fact, I used the snow as my wine cooler!
This winter, I am going to enjoy snuggling under a blanket in front of the fire and drinking a warm drink and feeling cosy. Have a great - um - Sunday I guess it is there x

Hi DC - keep at it. You will get there. Even if you have reduced your drinking, you are doing yourself a big favour. xx

[FreedGenie]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Journal Entry
Day 6

Morning All, the kids woke at 7.30am and I was fine about it. Feeling rested after a good nights sleep. If that had happened a week ago, I would have had to drag myself out of bed and downstairs to get their milk. My kids have always been well cared for and all of my efforts went on looking after them and anything left on looking after the house. Not much effort left for myself - or my husband if I want to be brutally honest.

If I didn't have children, I think I would have drank a lot more as would have thrown daytime drinking in to the mix for sure... although I guess I would have had a job (I'm now a stay at home Mum) so who knows...

Every day is getting better. I felt pretty rotten healthwise yesterday. Headache, fatigue and streaming nose and sneezing. I am still a bit coldy this morning but not so bad. I wonder if it's toxins leaving the system?

I still have no desire to drink. No cravings at all. In fact, I am getting out of things that I know would normally involve heavy drinking (by most people there) which fall after my AF30 days. Bizarre.

Althought this has been relatively painless so far, it is not my first attempt at controlling my drinking. I can't count how many times I have said 'I need to cut down, from now on I will only drink on weekends'. Monday would pass AF but by Tuesday evening, I'd be emailing my husband asking him to pick up a bottle of wine on the way home. Then I would feel I had failed that week so would carry on until the next Monday and so the cycle would continue. I then started to worry about why I couldn't get past Tuesday... and by fluke noticed a link to this website. I read and read and realised something had to be done... This site and all your amazing posts gave me what I needed to get on with it!! So thank you guys :l

We moved overseas about a year ago and so I have had to adjust to living in another Country/making new friends etc. It has been fine - I am quite a confident person and already have a nice group of friends and my kids are happy here (and hubby likes his job). I think that is when the drinking increased though. It was very stressful at first. I remember saying to a friend of mine that although I liked my new friends, I hadn't really met anyone that I could go out and 'be myself and have a laugh' with. On reflection, I now realised that I meant I hadn't met a drinking buddy... Anyway, the good news is that although my new friends knew I liked a drink or two, they certainly think nothing of me 'detoxing' and are not big drinkers themselves so we can always do things that do not revolve around drinking (and I usually see them during the day with the kids so it's not an issue anyway). It's when my old friends visit that they will be shocked! I think I would have to tell them in advance that this leopard has changed her spots!

Talking of visitors, my parents are coming over next week. As you know, there was a situation where my husband told me they voiced concern to him over my drinking. I was furious (had booze glasses on - I can now see they were caring) and asked them what was going on. They denied the conversation. My Mum said that sometimes people pretend they have had a conversation (ie my husband) so that they can make the point indirectly... My husband totally denies that so I will never know the truth. ANYWAY, they are coming and I don't know whether to tell them in advance that I am taking a month AF to get in control of my drinking or whether to tell them when they get here. They will notice for sure! I was never a secret drinker - they were totally aware that during the evening when they were sharing a bottle of red, that I was polishing off a bottle of white on my own.... I am sure they will be relieved and very happy and we will have a better time as I found having visitors totally exhausting when I was drinking... especially in the morning.

Enough rambling. It's good to get it all out though! Have a great day x

[Diet Coke]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Sat. Day 2. Friday was fine. Went from work to daughter's hs football game (she's a cheerleader) and then home after 10pm. Perfect-no time to fall into the after work habit.

Today is ok, but it is 80+ today in WA and I just said to my DH (we're running errands)that I wish there was a deck we could go sit and have a ....and he jumped in, NO, you told me 30 days.
That ticked me off...because I hate being told what to do! We both agreed we'll end up arguing over this...I stayed in the car when he went into the groc store (I hate the groc store), plus I didn't want to head for the wine. I'll be fine at home. I hate the "weekend" party/drink attitude we all develop.

I'll have a diet coke when I get home.

Have a good eve.
Dc

[Soulsearcher]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Inspired me...

Yours was the first story I read while just visiting this site. It struck a cord with me that drinking a few glasses of wine a night could be considered a problem. I've always thought I don't have a problem but the honesty is that I really do wonder if I can give it up at any time. I had a horrible last night thanks to alcohol and the inability to control my emotions. May have ruined my relationship with the man I love so dearly but it may also be the wake up call I needed. So here is my day 1... thanks for sharing so I can hopefully find my way through this time in my life....

[Pride before Fall]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Welcome, Soulsearcher!

FG, I've told people close to me I'm AF, gradually; the rest will figure it out eventually. Ironically, a lot of people don't even notice (even though I feel like a bug under a microscope--but that's lessening). As for your parents, go with what's comfortable for you. I'll be curious to see if anyone 'fesses up to having discussed your drinking if you tell them you've stopped! xoxo Pride

[Doggygirl]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

:welcome: soulsearcher! This is a great place to get handle on your problems with AL.

FG, congratulations on your progress not only with the AFness, but with sorting out your "relationship" with AL. Getting honest with myself about it was challenging, but a very necessary part of the process.

DC, congratulations on Day 2!!!!! You keep hanging in there. I used to get SOOOO defensive when my husband would say anything about drinking or not drinking. I didn't want to admit to myself how out of hand I had gotten, so I certainly didn't want even a HINT of anything about drinking coming from him. I can totally understand your reaction. Also, for me those first days and weeks without AL were hard. (FG, it's fabulous that you are not having such a difficult time!) MAN was I grumpy. That's pretty normal. The most important thing is to not drink. There will come a time when this all gets much easier if you just hang in there one day (or hour or moment) at a time.

DG

[Diet Coke]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

DG thanks. I asked him to help me get 30 days, but, like I said, I like to make my own decisions, which sometimes aren't the best.

Soulsearcher....read this whole thread. It's a good one for newer people who think there's an issue, but not really sure. FreedGenie pretty much thinks about the same things I have. The "funny" thing I found poking around the mwo site....we sure like our white wine in the evenings!!!

Have a good weekend.
Sat almost done

[FreedGenie]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Soulsearcher;967539 wrote: Yours was the first story I read while just visiting this site. It struck a cord with me that drinking a few glasses of wine a night could be considered a problem. I've always thought I don't have a problem but the honesty is that I really do wonder if I can give it up at any time. I had a horrible last night thanks to alcohol and the inability to control my emotions. May have ruined my relationship with the man I love so dearly but it may also be the wake up call I needed. So here is my day 1... thanks for sharing so I can hopefully find my way through this time in my life....

Good morning :welcome: I am so glad that reading my story may have helped you. That is exactly why I chose to share it - because all of the stories I read here made an impact on me but some touched me and really made me think. I really hope you can sort the relationship out with your man :l Let me know how you get on. I was also worrying that if I didn't sort myself out, it could have effected my marriage (I've been with my partner since we were 22 - so 16 years). I already have noticed a positive change since I went AF (or was it always positive and I didn't notice?).

How many days are you shooting for? I started with a target of 14 days but after a few days, decided to increase it to 30 days as I really want to spend some time thinking things thru and making a plan for moderation. I am going to be super strict and when I moderate, if I start bargaining with myself (I'm good at that) for extra drinks, I will immediately go AF for a period again until I have re-trained my brain.

I honestly think that if you recognise that your drinking behaviour is already causing you problems and can only get worse (or stay the same), then it's time to do something about it. My advice is read, read, read.... I found it very useful to read the posts of the people really battling heavy drinking. The ones having to drink in the morning to stop the shakes, throwing up, blacking out, secret drinking - things I have not been affected by personally but potentially could be in years to come if the alcohol consumption increased over time. It scared me enough to do something about it NOW. And... I promise I am telling the truth, it has been easy this time. I have no desire to drink at all. I am enjoying being sober, having a clear head and not having to worry about my bad evening habit.

Good luck - come back and tell us how you're getting on! xxx

[FreedGenie]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

DC - yay for day two!! Well done you!! I am so happy for you. Good on you for telling your hubby that you are going 30 days AF. It will help you to be accountable. Looking forward to hearing how you are getting on later.

Pride - exactly!! I am very interested to hear what my parents say when I tell them I am AF. I wonder if they will tell me what was said during the mystery phone call....? x

DG - thank you as always x

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Journal entry - day 7/30

Morning All. Another early start - 7am today. Hasn't my youngest heard of Sunday lie-ins?!!! Oh well, at least I had no hangover to contend with.

The cold has eased off. I am pretty certain it was a detox sign. My nose was streaming and I had an awful headache and that has tapered off to a dull headache and no cold. I googled detox and saw that many people have cold/flu symptoms and it's a good sign of toxins leaving the body

Last night was a chilled one. Dinner followed by watching The X-Factor in front of a roaring fire. I was in bed by 10.15 and asleep by 10.16 ha ha!! The funny thing is I am watching programs that I saw last week with a big white wine spritzer in my hand (oh did I not mention that I used to make spritzers with my wine as for some reason I found it too strong without??!) Laughable really. Did I miss it? NO!!!! It was nice to have a warm drink and not a cold one. I don't think I've had a warm drink after 5pm for a year.... until last week.

So, I'm going to do some chores this morning and then the girls have a friend (and her Mum) coming round after lunch. Tonight is X-Factor again so I am sorted!

Have a great day friends xx

[FreedGenie]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Day 7/30 (evening 7.20pm)
Well I am still not feeling great.. I feel like I've got a massive hangover! Can't think straight - feel a bit sick and irritable. I am sure it's just detoxing and hopefully, I will feel much better tomorrow. I'm going to go and have a bath and then watch x-factor by the fire. Early to bed again for me tonight. X

[Diet Coke]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

FG..
Sounds like detox to me. Every body does something different. If you are trying to cut down on sugar, that's going to add to the detox. You may not even know which one is making you feel bad. Make sure you do some vitamins, whether it's the plan on the site or just upping normal vitamins. I'm cutting back back on some anti-depressants and the websites also talk about the importance of vitamins. So I'm really trying to load up.

It's noon here. I don't expect any problems today. Last night I had a mix of flavored sparkling water with Fresca, in a big glass with lots of ice. It's usually my mixer if I have vodka, but, that was of no interest.

Challenge this week is getting to the gym or a walk, or something....after work so I don't head home and want to have a glass of wine.

The other big thing I have going is I'm so tired. Both yesterday and today I slept really late.....making the night a 12 hour night. In the past when this happened, I thought it was the wine + my anti-depressant not letting me wake up. It'll be interesting to see as I become AF longer, what happens. It's not like I'm staying up until 2 am! I'm even listening the hypno cds....strange.

Have a great Sunday (or what ever day it is now...) it's noon my time.

DC

[FreedGenie]

Newbie with wide-open eyes!

Hi DC, well done on staying AF. I am also v tired. I think the body is hard at work detoxing! Good luck today.

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Journal day 8/30

One week AF :-)
Still not feeling great. Very very tired. Taking vits and sleeping well at night but still tired. A man snapped at me today and in the old weery days I would have snapped back but today I just said 'sorry' and thought WHATEVER you moody git! I am feeling a bit emotional - I think it's just that I am feeling everything now and thinking it through. I have nothing to worry about. Another early night for me tonight me thinks!! x