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    #1

    Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

    Bonsoir a tous ! Me voila... tiny woman, celt, problem drinker in my teens, sober for 11 years, then ooops, i did it again, followed by sober cause pregnant/breastfeeding, then slowly, surely, a descent into more drinking than living. I live my life in french, (excuse my rusty english !!) in a country where wine is as cheap, if not cheaper, than fruit juice... but that isn't the problem, the problem is unless i am rigorous with myself, one, two, three drinks and i just finish everything in the house, there's no "off switch" !! The effort of juggling drunk/sober is too much now. I have 3 grown up kids elsewhere and one of 2 yrs who lives with me and my bottles, my frustrations, my anger that for the third time in my life i know i'm heading for big trouble unless i react to the small voice deep inside that says help, stop !! So, for the second time in my life, i stopped by the doctor today, told her i'm on 75cl a night (could be, has been more but deep down i love life, love being sober and want to get over this !!) Tomorrow i start B vits and a valium derivative. I have one last sip of wine in the kitchen, (nothing else in the house) which i will finish after posting this, and i hope/pray it will be the last. Sure i want more (or "more" wants me !!) but i also want to face my fears, and live in reality again. I am soooooo tired of this. My story is no better, no worse than many here. I haven't got it in me to tell it tonight, not really even sure exactly what my story is. I've read enough here to know that there is a time, a place to turn things around, and that many of you here have been where i have been and are going/have arrived at where i need to be. Would love to hear from anyone, in french or english, who is making this one small step in the right direction - life is for living, not being trapped in the dead end of a bottle So much i could say, but actions are what counts, so i'll shut up for now and try and get on with the next few days ! Thank you all for being here, for posting with such honesty and humour, i am proud of you, you have made me think, given me strength and above all hope. Bon (sober !) soiree a tous
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    #2
    Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

    Bienvenue petit femme!

    There.. that's my french exhausted! :H
    Yep, you're right.. we all have come to that turning point and are going from there. Kudos for going to talk to your doctor (I have never made it that far yet) - it sure sounds like you are ready for a change.

    Have you read the MWO book yet? You can download it from the store on this site. Also, the Toolbox thread has tons of information/coping skills, tips, and ideas.

    Wishing you well on your journey and looking forward to hearing more from you.
    Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?

    Winning since October 24th, 2013

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      #3
      Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

      Merci Sunshine_gg for your support. No kudos, it was desperation/panic at not succeeding in reducing my intake that got me to the dr's, also at 41, the body doesn't seem to roll with the punches so readily :$ Not sure anyone is "ready" for a change, but willing, desperate, yes !! Will download the book when pay cheque comes thru', thnx for link to toolbox, need all the tips & wrinkles i can get this time round, scared i'm gonna blow it - after all i should/did know better than to take this journey again, wish i didn't still have the relevant passeport !! Your paint horse is beautiful - horses always were my sanity... So, not a drop of alcohol in the house, i start tomorrow on seresta (valium) risk to get hooked on that according to the leaflet, but the side effects at least look no worse than how i am on a bottle of wine when i haven't eaten anything Will not be counting how many cigarettes i roll for the next few days, aieeee i have a way to go !!

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        #4
        Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

        One battle at a time, mon ami...
        You sound determined enough to really make a go of it... I have faith Why don't you join us in any of the threads in 'Just starting out' or 'General Discussion'? Would love to 'see' you there!

        Thank you for the comment about the paint. Yes, he's purdy but he can be a real stinker :H
        Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?

        Winning since October 24th, 2013

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          #5
          Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

          Thanks for that - one minute at a time from now on... the part of the brain cell that drinks is already rebelling at the idea that there is NO MORE !! Moderation is not on the menu for me (otherwise i would not be here, went from moderation to one, two, three, too many, not enough/oblivion in less than a year...) Will try and grope my way to the other threads soon - still fumbling about having lurked for a week ! Am taking comfort in your faith, all i seem to have is irritable nerves !!

          A purdy horse with character, cool (thank whichever deity you do/don't believe in that horses don't drink !!!! i had a pony who loved beer... but thankfully he never worked out how to buy/order his own

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            #6
            Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

            Hi Kelvie,

            This is a really great place you found to help you quit. I can not moderate as well, it's all or nothing and my body just can't handle the abuse of it.
            Do you live in France? I lived in the suburbs outside of Paris for a while, and the wine was much cheaper then the fruit and vegetables, that I can certainly relate to.
            There are some really great goal orientated threads on the site, have a nice look around and hopefully you find one or more that fits. All the best,

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              #7
              Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

              Thank you BB yeah, i'm lost in france, well brittany, not quite the same thing... as you say, it's true, wine is cheaper than anything healthy, i have no idea how my body is, it's too soon to tell, but i do know i'm not as fit as i was when last AF, and i am not doing anything much as i should, would like too. It's a great site, good to know i am not alone and i can't help feeling if i had stumbled in here a year or so ago, i would not be where i am now !! I'd love to moderate, err no, translate that as i'd love to drink, but that's not how it works, is it !!! Am fumbling my way around here, knowing i will need everything i can get over the next few days/weeks, this time i am not risking going it alone, it's too easy to make mistakes/con myself ! best of all things (sans alcool) to you as well

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                #8
                Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

                Hi Kelvie
                We have a regular member "Expat" who is Irish and living in Paris and who speaks fluent French. I'm sure she would love to chat with you. You will find a crowd of us over on the daily army thread under general discussion where there is usually always someone hanging out. As Sunshine suggests check out the toolbox there is loads of great advice in there. Wishing you well.

                Chill
                "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
                AF - JAN 1st 2010
                NF - May 1996

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                  #9
                  Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

                  I'd love to moderate, err no, translate that as i'd love to drink >>

                  Welcome, K. I just might make that my new signature line. :H:H

                  I wanted to move to France for a while, where people weren't so uptight about drinking and smoking. Alas, my French is limited to "steak frites" and "la plume de ma tante est sur la table," which would've made it kind of tough to find work.

                  I'm glad you've joined us! Community isn't a cure for drinking, but it sure can help.

                  xoxo Pride
                  AF since July 15, 2010. :applouse:
                  "People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim." —Ann Landers

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

                    Hi again Chillgirl (portugal - you are just down the road from me !) thanks for that, i will get round to looking expat up Will scramble aboard other threads soon, feeling kinda nervy and unsure of things, but that will pass (and come back and pass etc !!) have bookmarked the tool box

                    Pride, lol, one of the reasons i was leery about moving here was the relaxed attitude to alcohol/smoking !! The area where i live has the highest stats for alcohol/suicide... things are changing, but there is a long way to go. Part of why i signed up here was realising my "sorrows" had become olympic swimmers whilst i was still drowning... Community isn't the cure, but at least it's good to be around people who are seeking and helping with solutions

                    Felicitations both of you on your respective AF NF

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                      #11
                      Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

                      Hey neighbor!
                      I'm actually Scottish but have been enjoying the Portuguese sunshine for the last 9 years. Although I got my apprenticeship in drinking in Glasgow being an expat down here didn't help as it's a huge drinking culture. Anyway, no longer an issue for me, I don't drink and I'm looking forward to my 1st sober Christmas in ooopp.....nearly 30 years! :shocked:
                      "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
                      AF - JAN 1st 2010
                      NF - May 1996

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

                        Kelvie,

                        Just a welcome from me. I hope you find your stride here and can get back on the AF lifestyle. MWO has helped me immensely and I'm AF for a bit over seven months. I wish you well and look forward to getting to know you better! John
                        Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

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                          #13
                          Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

                          Chillgirl, bravo !! i shall drink your health on xmas day with my favourite af tipple, fizzy h2o & oj. There are scots on my fathers side of the family from up beyond dundee. I think every country has a huge drinking culture, just some are more open about it than others, mind, my dr did mention that celts are somewhat over-represented in the problem drinking/alcoholic league tables, whatever, we are all only human even if some of us can swallow super human amounts of booze... i still have the scars from several xmas's that i don't (thank goodness ?!?!) remember. Here's wishing you a memorable (for all the right reasons !) festive season

                          Techie, thank you, baby steps for now, stides to follow ! Congrats on your seven months and best wishes for the ones ahead

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

                            Oh, cool. It's fun that this place is diverse. I'll second the congrats on seven months :O
                            kelvie, I'm an English speaker, and you're teaching me new words. Love it!

                            we are all only human even if some of us can swallow super human amounts of booze
                            gives me an idea for a comic strip. The hero is a drunk of super proportions, accomplishing amazing feats like getting away with flying drunk and hangover immunity.

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Resigning from trying to empty the EU wine surplus

                              Hi guy with a headache

                              (which you will get again if you read my wonky english postings here :$) Funny reading that, a long time ago, at the height of my denial, i could only ever see the funny side of the scrapes i got into and (miraculously) out of... what really hits home now, is that all of us here are (whatever state we are in) are still alive to tell the tale and to change the ending of the story of our lives, sobering thoughts... what i laugh at now is my inner dipso which still has ideas about the possibilities of just one glass sometime - no way, not a road (dead end) i dare or wish to take !! Welcome aboard, bon courage

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