Another Newbie

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

Last night was a bit tough. We had company over to play a game and I told them to bring wine if that's what they wanted. Funny the hardest part was the period of time before they got here. Between 4pm and 6pm is really the time when I would like a drink. They arrived at seven I poured their wine and it really did not bother me. I think my mind is so set on the 3 months that there is nothing that can change it. I didn't know I could be so stubborn. One of our guests even said the old...'ohhh one can't hurt you" hahahah my response was, ' I don't just want one, if I have one I will want at least 3, so why would I have 1?' Besides I am keeping my promise I made to myself. This is the Judestir experiment!

Have a great AF Sunday everyone.

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

Just thinking to myself, that in my past, it would have been normal for me to have wine well before any company had arrived. I think normal drinkers wait for their company, then open up the bottle. Hmmm this is food for thought, if moderation is ever in my future. Another question for myself is ...do I need wine to feel comfortable socializing with people, even good friends??? Last night, after I got past the witching hours, I was fine AF!

I have my very best friend coming to visit this Thur, Fri , and Sat. I have not seen her in awhile and I am quite excited. We are drinking buddies. I don't remember the last time we were together that there wasn't alcohol involved. She knows what I am doing and will be supportive. Having said that, I do plan on having some cider and wine in the house for her. Just becasue I am not drinking doesn't mean she can not. I know this approach does not work for everyone, but I would love to learn to be around drinkers and not be a drinker. Maybe I am asking too much of myself, maybe not. But I will know by this time next week, just how hard it is.

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

I'ld be a much happier person right now if I had a glass of wine on this cold Wed evening at 5:15. But I am not having one JUST BECAUSE I PROMISED MYSELF I WOULD NOT! And that is that!!

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

My best friend is coming to visit for 3 nights starting tomorrow. If I think tonight is a challenge, the next few days will be even more so. She knows what I am doing, but I will still buy here some wine and cider. This is my thing, not hers. It will feel very odd visiting without alchohol involved. She is not only my best friend, but my drinking buddy too. I am committed to the three months of sobriety.

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

Hahahah I guess I am repeating myself here. Too funny!! Did you guys know my best friend is coming for a visit...hahahah her flight gets in a 8pm

The little voice is already talking.....' ahhh Jude you only live once and she has flown all the way across the country to see you." " You will be fine if you just have a few with her tonight". There is more but you get the jist.

The thing is, if i drink tonight, then what about tomorrow night and the next night? It just gives me license to keep on going. A promise is a promise is a promise. There will always be something or some reason to have a drink and i knew that when I signed up for the three months. SO SUCK IT UP BUTTERCUP!! and see how much you can enjoy peoples company without a buzzzzzzzzz on!

Still have to go to the liquor store to pick up the pear cider (her poison of choice). Guess I better get to it.

Later Gators....

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

I think I will go check out the jumpers and see how my cruise mates are doing.

[BlondeAFAmbition]

Another Newbie

Hi Judestir-Be strong, you can do it! It sounds like you have the mindset for it, that is great! You are right, you made a promise to yourself. I hope your friend is as supportive as you said, that will also help quite a bit I should think. Enjoy your visit! Sounds like a very special friend.

[RudyB]

Another Newbie

gotta hop on here and say i'm thrilled to ahve found this thread. you all are so awesome~! i'm on my 21st day al free and feeling so friggin grateful that i don't hate myself anymore. phew. also, on the supps, it's prob in the lit about said lifesavers, but i hear gaba is great for relaxation, which is excellent for we who choose not to drink after so long choosing to drink. chime in if you've had success with this, por favor.
anyway, thanks for the comfort i get in reading all of your posts. i relate to sooo much of what is being said here. judestir, sounds like you ahve a great hubby. good for you!
peace and joy everyone. hi ho! sober here on my former favorite drink-to-drunk night. wee haw!
rudyb

[RudyB]

Another Newbie

judestir, good gracious luck with your friend's visit. i know in my history when i was committed to not drink i was usually able to do that as long as i wasn't alone. (my biggest drinks were poured in solitude, or w my son at my feet. eee gad!) i hope you can resist the temptation. i mean, you can!
i also remember hearing that foot fungus medication is pretty hard on the liver, which is prob why no drinky drink. take some milk thistle if you can as that's a great liver tonic.

stay strong. sounds like you're doing great. and keep in mind that it gets better and better. even with the down days in mind, i know that to be true.

[RudyB]

Another Newbie

piper, we do wish you lots of luck. i, too, was suffering horrible guilt and sadness (and shame!). as if by a miracle, they went away as soon as i committed to being sober. give it a go. let us know how you're doing. take the advice and introduce yourself on the my story part. i'd like to hear more about you. every story i read helps me feel stronger and more supported in my challenging journey. you are definitely NOT alone in your struggle.
~rudyb

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!

I made it through the weekend. My girlfriend drank every night, we went to the pub for appies one night, and out for Italian with my husband on another. They drank, I did not!! Well my husband had one glass of wine and said he didn't like it (I think he had it more to make my friend feel at home) but she had a drink before we left, four glasses of wine at dinner and a drink when we got back home. Then she thanked me very much for the herbal tea I made her.

Now I know many would say that she was not being supportive, but I don't quite look at it that way. She honestly does not see me as having a problem. We have talked extensively about drinking and her family has some pretty bad history with alchohol....so she does understand where I am coming from. Hmmm hard for me to explain, but I was OK with her drinking because she was on a holiday away from work, family etc....and that is what she wanted to do. She was my guest, so if she was happy, I was happy. Kind of like my husband buying me wine so I would be happy. We certainly can not tell other people when and when not to drink. And I am doing this for myself and for no one else. I am not saying that it was easy for me either. I would have loved to have had a drink in the pub and a couple of wine with dinner. I am proud of myself for not listening and for being able to laugh at the voices in my head that were saying "ohhh you can join them just for tonight"

Anyways, we did have a lovely visit and I had a good cry yesterday when we took her into the city for her 4 day conference. I have had so many goodbyes lately that one would think that I would be good at it by now. Actually there is joy in the tears and the saying of goodbyes, because that means I have something very special in my life that I will be missing.......at least until we meet again.

Patts self on buttt for a job well done!!
Next big challenge will be when hubby goes away on bussiness. Alone time is a trgger time!

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

Hey Ruby.....you are doing great. So how many days now for you? I have actually lost count and need to go check. It might also be a good time to step back and write down how I am feeling without having wine in my system.

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

Hi Blonde......gotto go check out the cruise thread. I have been MIA for the weekend. And yes she is my dearest friend!

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

It is happy hour and I find myself missing my friends, family and job.....not wine. I guess that's a good thing.

[Judestir]

Another Newbie

What a great sleep I had last night. Nine hours with many wonderful feel good dreams. After a botttle of wine, I rarely made it though the night without waking up to drink water. And getting back to sleep at 2am was difficult too. So another positive to put on my list.