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[mumofsix]

I am a 44 year old Mum of 6 wonderful kids and wife of 24 years to a generally great but extra busy husband. I am a binge drinker - usually about twice per week but starting to become a bit more frequent. I drink wine but can drink usually about two 750 ml bottles in a hit. I lost 40kgs 5 years ago and took up running and the gym which I love. I maintain my weightloss but I really feel that I am a alcoholic and the wine is impeding my exercise and running. I run marathons/half marathons but notice that I am feeling really sluggish lately and not so healthy and I feel that if I dont stop now it will impact everything. I am an ex smoker giving this up when I took up my weightloss journey. My husband works away alot (he is in the States as I type) and I use the booze to numb my frustrations with kids/myself/life etc and this has to stop. This year I am going to America from where I live in New Zealand to run the New York marathon. I have a fantastic life so dont know why I'm doing what I do but I just dont want to do it anymore. Today is my first day in what will be a long journey but one that I am determined to take.:new:

[mario]

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Hi and welcome mumofsix to mwo,you have come to a great community with lots of good advice & support,read as many posts & threads as you can and post your & share your feelings,you are not alone on this battle and I hope you give yourself a chance to beat this.

[mumofsix]

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Thankyou Mario

I feel alot more positive than I did this afternoon. I have fed my kids their dinner and now sitting back and watching the evening news, Hubbie rang me this afternoon where he had just got to his hotel in Atlanta (or wherever the hell he is over there). Tomorrow I will go for a long run on my treadmill since I cant go on the roads with having to look after the kids solo. I am currently training for a few half marathons I have - one on 30th April and then the next 22nd May and then I may do the Gold Coast Marathon in Australia in July before the Taupo half Marathon in August. THEN I head over to the states to run the New York marathon in Novemeber. I just need to stay sober instead of putting what is acutally a very healthy toned body ( I also work out at the gym 4 times per week doing weights with a trainer) through such crap all the time. I HATE addiction and wish I wasnt like it. :thanks:

[mario]

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Well momofsix you seem to be very busy woman,which is good as one of the best ways to help in this battle is to have a plan and to keep oneself busy & distracted,But remember you didn't get to where you are in one day so it wont disappear in one day,There is a thread in the monthly abstinence forum which has a tool box,check that out it will help,have to go hope to see you around the boards :-) You took a great step in coming here today well done.

[Chillgirl]

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:welcome: Mumofsix
It sounds like you already have the motivation to crack this and you certainly have lots of good incentives. The key triggers will be when you've had a successful day and feel like you deserve a reward. Make sure you are ready to deal with the voice of AL in your head telling you how nice it would be to relax with a glass of wine. Remind yourself how bad it makes you feel about yourself, how much harder it is to cope the next day, that alcohol is poison and that you no longer drink. Keep checking in as you will get plenty encouragement here. Wishing you strength.

[mumofsix]

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Chillgirl

Thats exactly the trigger - after a "hard run" and I'm craving sugar and I'm tired is when the voice starts telling me to kickback on the deck with a nice Merlot or glass of bubbly. Which is all well and good but I dont stop at one I stop at two bottles. This in itself is not good for keeping off weight and keeping myself healthy physically never mind the emotional toll. It gets abit hard having to get up in the morning,making the kids lunches for school, getting them on the bus and then heading out the door for the 45 minute drive to the gym. I have worked so hard to get where I have and feel myself turning into a drunken failure. At least I can come on here now and vent - laptops are wonderful things. I think this site and all you wonderful supportive people may help change my life. If I can type and vent instead of holding all the emotions in it will probably help. I am so very grateful tonight.

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

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Welcome Mumofsix, great that you found us, you are right, this place does change lives.
Keep safe
KTAB

[sunshinetoday]

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Hello Mumofsix and WELCOME!!!

I applaud your steps in the right direction. The more you post on here the more you'll find how easy it is to relate. Many of us have been where you are. I unfortunately went past that point and kept going to further points without even understanding I had a problem. I have recently found this website and in one week it has helped me feel a profound sense of hope and renewal. Everyday is a new day to take a step forward, even if I fall off the horse, I find motivation to keep going. Again welcome and I look forward to your posts.
:rays:
Sunny

[RedJib]

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Hi mumofsix. I have to say that you must have an AMAZING constitution. I've been and on-and-off runner for 20 years, and in all that time there has never been a morning that I could have run a single mile if I'd downed two bottles of wine the night before. Even the equivalent of a single bottle of wine leaves me dulled enough the next day that running was a chore, not a joy, that's for sure.

Even with that remarkable capacity for AL and exercise, you're still taking some serious risks, risks that you know better than anyone. And with six kids to look after (on your own, it seems, much of the time) I hope you can figure out how channel that Type A drive into sobriety or moderation, whichever works for you. They surely need you to stay healthy and safe.

Congrats on all those marathons, too!
Jib

[mumofsix]

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Good morning everyone - I hope this day finds you all healthy and happy and feeling great. Day three for me this morning and I am feeling fine so far - actually thats a lie I'm feeling kidded out but other than that fine.
JIB my kids are 22,21,19,15,12,10 so not babies and I dont actually drink around them - only at night when I am by myself. I am lucky enough to live on a 70 acre block and we have a large house so the kids all have their own spaces. In fact our 21 year old is 21 in May and has survived not one but two bouts of brain cancer. One at aged 5 and one at 17. Out of the older ones he is the only one at home. Daugher is at Wellington at Victoria University (google is your friend) doing Law and International relations and son lives with his Partner in Otorohanga (about 20 minutes away) from us. I know I'm taking serious risks which is why I AM trying to change my behavour. It is all a step in the right direction andI cant do any more than try and work at it. I will go for my first run this morning - I actually feel abit tired ( I guess it is only 5.30am) but I think that its the lack of sugar and alcohol. I promised I'd take the two smaller ones to Rango which has just opened here in NZ. Hubbie is fine all the way over in Atlanta and apparently missing us (yeah right) Have a wonderful day everyone - this place feels like HOME. Ka Kite Ano. Kia Kaha ( Bye for now and stay strong)

[mumofsix]

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I do however feel sorta - twitchy and stressed this morning - oh well the day hasnt quite yet started so better move to get my mind off this feeling. I am also feeling bad tempered. I hope this is normal.

[Rusty]

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Yes, what you're feeling is normal....minor withdrawal symptoms and/or anxiety that comes with the first few days of being AF. It will get better, I promise.:l

[ATLThrash]

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Mum--Very normal to feel like you do. I have survived a couple serious illnesses and I found that after it was all over (or I pray so) that I collapsed and "treated" myself with wine or whatever (that coincided with the birth of my lovely boy a successful but difficult pregnancy) . Then I started thinking-- how in the heck was I able to survive illnesses, work etc-- and now that it is all over and I have less to do I am wallowing in the bottle! That was one thing that got me here. By the way, I am in Atlanta and it is very warm today-- over 80 degrees according to my thermometer! Also I just swept the back deck and loads of pollens and molds-- if he is not used to it he may have quite a headache here! My dearest friend in the ATL is from NZ-- Christs Church. She is a great rep for NZ-- a lovely person and you sound so too. Good luck

[mumofsix]

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ATLThrash;1094975 wrote: Mum--Very normal to feel like you do. I have survived a couple serious illnesses and I found that after it was all over (or I pray so) that I collapsed and "treated" myself with wine or whatever (that coincided with the birth of my lovely boy a successful but difficult pregnancy) . Then I started thinking-- how in the heck was I able to survive illnesses, work etc-- and now that it is all over and I have less to do I am wallowing in the bottle! That was one thing that got me here. By the way, I am in Atlanta and it is very warm today-- over 80 degrees according to my thermometer! Also I just swept the back deck and loads of pollens and molds-- if he is not used to it he may have quite a headache here! My dearest friend in the ATL is from NZ-- Christs Church. She is a great rep for NZ-- a lovely person and you sound so too. Good luck

Thankyou very much how did your friend fair in the Christchurch quake - it has totally devastated the city and much rebuilding has to be done. Anyway went for a 10k run this morning and then 10k walk home, took the kids to the movies and McDonalds and now settling in for the rest of the day. Its 3pm here on Sunday so I imagine my dear husband will ring soon. Tomorrow all back to normal - kids school, me have to work for only this week and then I'll have a run/housework etc. Hubbie home Friday and then Bruno Mars Concert on following Monday 18th and start of kids school holidays.

[Miss Behaving]

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OMG M6 - you put me to shame!!! So far today I have read the paper and done two loads of washing .............!!!!! It must be true what they say about those Waikato women :-)