I have decided that what happens during the next phase of my life is, as my username suggests, my call. I have found many different reasons, many different people to blame for the way my life has turned out so far but have to start being honest with myself - There is only one person responsible and one person who can change things.
This is my story:
For the last fifteen years I have drank at least a bottle of wine pretty much every evening. Just having one bottle of wine in the house would cause me to get stressed; what if I finish the first too quickly? I might have to resort to whisky or gin (which I don't particularlyu like :0 )
I have, over recent years, been able to miss days of drinking (18 alcohol free days in February!!) but soon find myself back on track with the bottle + per day. I can't do moderation - its all or nothing for me. Here's why it has to be nothing from now on;
My health is starting to suffer - I have terrible stomach pains at times, have done for nearly a year now. Doctor thinks I have gastritis (known to be caused by alcohol) I hadn't told her my drinking pattern!!
I feel really awful in the mornings - no energy, dizzy, sick, fuzzy headed etc
My children are starting to lose all respect for me (who can blame them when I will do anything to get out of having to pick them up from anywhere after 8pm - interupts my drinking time!) They witness me sparko on the sofa regularly and I am clearly not a good role model
I can't afford it - between ?35 - ?40 per week just to feel terrible? What's that all about??
When I'm in company, my ability to follow conversations and join in is crazily impaired. I'm always the first to leave because I am to spaced out to carry on
I watch TV and have to re watch it the following day - can't follow what's going on
Here's the no brainer - I don't enjoy it :0 Its a really bad habit which gives me no pleasure whatsoever.
I panic though. This has been my way of life for such a long time. I know the alternative is much, much better - I have tasted it - but still, the old lifestyle keeps pulling me back. I feel ridiculously deprived - like a kid with it's nose up against the window of a sweet shop "Why can't I have some?"
The only thing stopping me from stopping is the feeling that I will be missing something - I do look forward to opening that bottle of wine every evening.
I have to make a decision now, to cut alcohol out of my life.
To anyone who's made it this far, thanks for reading. I will hopefully be posting much more positive stuff in the future
)
This is my story:
For the last fifteen years I have drank at least a bottle of wine pretty much every evening. Just having one bottle of wine in the house would cause me to get stressed; what if I finish the first too quickly? I might have to resort to whisky or gin (which I don't particularlyu like :0 )
I have, over recent years, been able to miss days of drinking (18 alcohol free days in February!!) but soon find myself back on track with the bottle + per day. I can't do moderation - its all or nothing for me. Here's why it has to be nothing from now on;
My health is starting to suffer - I have terrible stomach pains at times, have done for nearly a year now. Doctor thinks I have gastritis (known to be caused by alcohol) I hadn't told her my drinking pattern!!
I feel really awful in the mornings - no energy, dizzy, sick, fuzzy headed etc
My children are starting to lose all respect for me (who can blame them when I will do anything to get out of having to pick them up from anywhere after 8pm - interupts my drinking time!) They witness me sparko on the sofa regularly and I am clearly not a good role model
I can't afford it - between ?35 - ?40 per week just to feel terrible? What's that all about??
When I'm in company, my ability to follow conversations and join in is crazily impaired. I'm always the first to leave because I am to spaced out to carry on
I watch TV and have to re watch it the following day - can't follow what's going on
Here's the no brainer - I don't enjoy it :0 Its a really bad habit which gives me no pleasure whatsoever.
I panic though. This has been my way of life for such a long time. I know the alternative is much, much better - I have tasted it - but still, the old lifestyle keeps pulling me back. I feel ridiculously deprived - like a kid with it's nose up against the window of a sweet shop "Why can't I have some?"
The only thing stopping me from stopping is the feeling that I will be missing something - I do look forward to opening that bottle of wine every evening.
I have to make a decision now, to cut alcohol out of my life.
To anyone who's made it this far, thanks for reading. I will hopefully be posting much more positive stuff in the future
)
wl:
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