A New Beginning

[Shephard]

Hello,

I've never before spoken about or told my story so I am not really sure how I should start it.

Until almost three years ago I was always a responsible drinker, where I could just go to the pub, have 2 or 3 drinks and go home sober apart from the odd birthday party I went to. After a bad ending to what would be a long term relationship to me, things started to spiral out of control.

A friend of mine too was going through the same situation as me at the time and we began hitting the pubs nearly every night, and it wouldn't be just a simple 2 or 3 drinks it would be anything between 8 and 15 plus and then going into work the following day with a massive hangover. There were times where we could go 14 days in a row drinking. This continued for a good four to five months and then we dropped down to about 3 nights a week.

There would have been no limit to how much I would have drank in a night if it was not for the bars and clubs closing. About 9 months ago I became unemployed and had no choice but to cut back going out to the pubs to 1 night a week but still I drank at home regulary.

I am now in a situation where when I do go out to drink, I have no restriction to how much I drink and drink until I have no money left. I end up getting drunk and embarrassing myself somehow and I have gotten to the stage now that I want to stop drinking but I don't really know how to go about it.

If I go about 6-7 days without drinking, I start getting cravings and become uncomfortable, irritated, tense and cannot concentrate on anything and have a bad habit of giving in to my cravings and end up back where I started. It is really starting to affect me in certain ways and in truth have made some bad decisions in the past due to drinking.

So I am now once again on my first 24 hours sober and I am going to attempt to simply give up drinking altogether, as I know that if I try to just cut back on consumption I will only go back to my old ways.

So that is my story and any advice that anyone could give me would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you for reading.

[Flossie]

A New Beginning

Hi Shephard

Just to say a hugh warm welcome to MWO :welcome:

Congratulations on making the decision to give up AL, we will try and help you anyway
we can so please post and read as much as you can.

You may wish to start a thread in the Just Starting Out section or you could join in the Newbies nest where you will get a find a lot of others in the same predicament as you.

I wish you well, it is the hardest thing I have even done but so very worth it.

Look forward to hearing from you more on MWO.

with luv Flo x

[sunshinetoday]

A New Beginning

Hi Shep,
Way to go being here and sharing. Also, Welcome.
I think you will find many of us had similar situations. For myself I went through a very rough ending of a relationship, hugged the bottle, and didn't let it go for years. So you're ahead of the game.
There is so many good threads here, and heaps of support.
Again Welcome!

[Barbara1234]

A New Beginning

Welcome Shep, Morning Sunshine and Flo,

Shep, I can't tell you the number of times I've sank to the bottom of a bottle over a relationship break up. Although at the time, it did numb the pain, I realized that drinking just prolonged having to face the situation.
There's nothing wrong with the mourning process, but as an alcoholic, I have had to find different ways out of painful situations. I can't lean on alcohol for anything anymore because it is not my friend.
This site has a lot to offer if you want to stop drinking or modify, whatever works for you.
Check out the various threads and find your niche, find some like minded friends and your own path.
This is a good, safe place that you have come to. Yes, check out the nubies nest, there are lots of us there just starting out....Welcome.

[Shephard]

A New Beginning

Thank you all for the warm welcome and it definatly helps make me feel like I am not alone on the long journey that is ahead of me.

Today has been my second day alcohol free and have been doing well and decided to go out to paintball with a friend of mine to get out of the house. My friend has never drank alcohol in his life upon telling him of giving up alcohol he said he will give me all the support that he can which is a huge boost in confidence for me.

I also mentioned it to my mother this evening, though her reply was that little bit more unsupportive compared to my friends as I got a simple "I'll believe it when I see it." In a way however it gives me a bit more of a boost again to prove to her that I am capable of giving up the alcohol. But so far today overall I am feeling good in myself, feeling healthier and more active.

I'm starting to attempt to become more active, whether it be going to the gym, paintballing, bowling and so on, and once again my friend said he will be there to help me out along the way. So here is to another 24 hours and many more

[keepwalking]

A New Beginning

Hi there Shep, well done on accepting your problem and working on a way out! If you want to commit to getting more active why not join us on the focus on fitness thread, but be warned you have to do some form of exercise every day through June, eat NO Junk and have no alcohol, its a struggle some days but we are all in it together, we have a giggle to, so jump in and find your focus, you would me most welcome x

[choice]

A New Beginning

Hi Shephard,
You are so not alone. Your story really resonates with me. Towards the end of my drinking the amount I could consume really scared me. I know what you mean about somehow getting from being a 2-3 drink person to a 8 and beyond. Sometimes I still can't believe that happened. I don't know how I let it get to that point. I guess it was gradual over a maybe 5 year span when I was not keeping track and really couldn't get enough. Never satisfied with the substance anymore I kept thinking more would help, of course it didn't. Sorry about what your mom said. I got some responses like that in the beginning too and it hurts. But, I understand why people said the things they said too. What's great is knowing that not drinking is a good decision. When I quit sometimes I'd just hold on to that. It was sometimes all I had. One day at a time sounds trite but it really got me through some rough times. When I felt like drinking I'd say... no, I really can be proud of myself when I wake up tomorrow and it's another day AF. (Even if that was at 7:30 in the am... and I had 24 hours to go). You'll be surprised at how strong you can be.
Take care, choice

[Habsfan]

A New Beginning

Welcome Shephard and congratulations on joining MWO. As you've seen the membership is made up of people who have experienced the same things you have. Always remember, you're not alone and when the temptation hits as it likely will, your friends here will do all they can to help.
Newbies Nest is a great place to check out as most of us there are either in the early days of joining or like me, back again. I was absent for 2 years and made it over 1 year AF only to get back into old routines. I know that I have to quit completely, I can't moderate.
Today is Day 4 for me and the withdrawal symptoms are strong so don't be surprised if you experience this as well. Being AF is worth every bit of the withdrawal!
Congratulations on your decision to make such a positive change in your life Shep and don't hesitate to lean on your friends here.
Russ

[Shephard]

A New Beginning

Hi Keepwalking thank you for the offer, i will most certainly look through the boards on that.

Your story and words are very inspiring Choice and thank you for sharing it with me.

Day 3 and the cravings are starting to kick in, though I know that I can keep myself from falling victim to them, though it is tomorrow which I am slightly worried about. I will be attending a funeral tomorrow and I know that afterwards everyone will be drinking, and I know that I will be feeling the temptation to join them.

I will definatly do my best on this situation, it will be a case of having a coke or orange or something and then take my leave, as I know the longer I stay the harder it would become for me to resist so fingers crossed for Day 4

[Kaslo]

A New Beginning

Hi Shepard... welcome to a great place, its a shelter in the storm, and has helped so many people. Post post post! Keep talking. Make a list of all the shite you hate about alcohol and put it in your pocket, and take it to the funeral with you. Slip it out and read it when you need to. When it comes to the AL consumption, do you best maybe even just make a few handshakes around and leave. The person who died would probably say fair play. You will not be feeling totally well. You have a brilliant excuse. You have to look out for yourself right now, and other drinkers will try to coax you back to thier nest. Be resolved! Wishing you the best of luck, and I am going to try and check in at the end of my western day to see how you did. If I can do it, you can do it!!

kaslo