I am one of those drinkers who can go from buzzed and "the life of the party" to incapacitated in seconds. I never see it coming. I get over confident and think that I can drink more when really I can't. I don't seem to have that "shut off" switch that everyone else has. And I get either violent or say things that are totally embarrasing or stupid or I get all emotional. Why do some people have this tendency while other people just mellow or are really drunk, but not embarrasing themselves? I just don't get it.
I'm here to turn over a new leaf, though. I am sick and tired of being the drunk loser. I don't drink every night or even every weekend, but when I do, I usually over do it. I'm hoping to try moderation and was successful this weekend in doing so, but I didn't leave the house. I am trying to embrace the concept of "sipping." Interesting, I never knew you could do that with wine!
My family and friends ask me why I drink like this when I have so much going for me? I'm not really sure. I am comfortable in social situations without a drink. A drink just makes things better. I used to feel like I was alone until I found this site. I was so scared. My over-drinking has caused many problems in my life including broken bones, lost cell phones and credit cards, lost friendships, and fighting with my boyfriend. I feel so ashamed the day after a bad night and it is definately affecting my self esteem. I beat myself up over it. I never looked for help until now because I thought AA was the only option, and "I don't drink every day!" I now realize it is more about what happens when you drink than how much you drink.
I may never know what causes me to drink the way that I do, but I do know that my life will be better because of moderation. If I can't do moderation, I will try abs. Anyway, just wanted to share a little bit about myself and to say thanks for being here and for telling your stories because you have given me hope.
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