TND: Thanks . Hope your meeting and errands went well today - take care
And since it?s 9:45, that means I?m through my 3rd day. One of the things I?m a little grateful of is living in a country that only sells alcohol in designated shops. My local one closes at 7pm, so once I get past that I feel fairly safe. There is still a pub nearby yes, but I find it easier to avoid going there than to avoid going down to the shop.
Not been a bad day here. Had proper meals, been for a walk, had a hot bath. Seem to be developing a cold though, but that’s not much of a problem really, just requires more tea
I think.. The whole old eating disorder habit is maybe a part of the reason why I?m a bit careful about making commitments to stay off the drink for longer periods of time. As soon as I start thinking about setting long time goals, like a year, or a month - I start panicking and getting that same feeling that I?m depriving myself of something. And making it, in my head, into something more desirable just because I tell myself I can?t have it. I?m working on that, and trying to get this part of me to accept that - unlike chocolate, this is something I have a very good health reason to ban - and also, unlike food, alcohol is not something I need any more than I needed to smoke.
Not quite there yet, so, at the moment I?m sticking with “today”, like I did yesterday and the day before – and, I hope, will do tomorrow. I?m edging my way carefully towards “week”.
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