I hope by sharing my story that it will be of some help to others on the same journey to an alcohol free life. My name is Joe and I live in Scotland, I had a happy childhood, until my last year at primary school, or some may no it as junior school. That’s when my life became a living hell during school term. I was bullied from my last year at Primary school till my last year at high school. It wasn’t till later on in life that I realised how badly this had affected my life. I coped with bullying by withdrawing into my own world, and was not allowed to develop and grow up like other kids at school. I was always very nervous and anxious around groups of more than one person; I had no self esteem no confidence in myself, and was always very depressed and felt so alone.
Anyway that’s just some background information of where my relationship with alcohol began. I left school at 16 years of age got my first job, I also had my first drink at 16. Which was lager after one pint of lager I got a glow I feeling I had never experienced before, I felt relaxed and was able to talk to people.
My drinking really took off after I turned 21, I became a binge drinker at that time and would drink to get drunk and block things out from the past. This only made things worse, I lost many jobs, brought grief to my mum and dads life it affected my relationship with everyone who came into contact with me, I had my first girlfriend when I was 21, but all of my relationships were doomed to fail because of the underlying issues that I had. When I drank one or two I was the life and soul of the party, when I had to much, I became very low, resented the world hated everyone, had so much anger inside wanted to kill the people who had bullied me, and also just wished god would take me away from all of this.
At the age of 27 I met my future wife, who was a wonderful gentle caring loving person, a year later we got married, she had previously been married to a partner who was also addicted to alcohol, I hid my drink problem from her and told her I only liked a drink at the weekend, she had two children by her ex partner. We where happy to begin with but looking back now I destroyed her life and made my step kids life hell. My drinking eventually got worse and worse, again I lost jobs brought a lot of pain on both families. It was just all downhill after that.
In 2000 I came to a point in my life where I knew if I didn’t stop Id be dead soon, I had read in one of the daily newspapers about a new drug called Acamprosate (Campral) which helped take the craving ‘s for alcohol away. I went to my GP and asked if he would consider prescribing Campral for me, he advised me I would have to be referred to a counsellor before he would consider this, I was referred to an Addictions Counsellor, and this is when I realised how much damage the bullying at school had done to my life.
My GP prescribed a Librium detox to help take the edge of my withdrawal from alcohol, he then prescribed Campral for me, and it worked but it doesn’t work on its own, you need to have either one to one support or take up a new activity, and also change your lifestyle, I had to get rid of my old drinking buddies, who when I look back where not buddies, but like me only chasing the next drink and would become friends with who ever could help you get that next drink.
I was alcohol free till to 2005 when I went on holiday to Malta with my now ex wife, while there I decided that I could have a drink, and control it, which I did while on holiday but on returning home my drinking took off again I had some months alcohol free but then all went down hill again, this time I had affairs and started to gamble and amass debts, my marriage came to an end I lost my home and family, I again managed a period of abstinence, my ex wife became a good friend and my step kids got close, I joined a church was born again was happy and contented went to a support group once a week in the church, I had grandkids who I loved to bits, but once again I hit the drink, I wouldn’t drink when I was with my family, but I drank in the local pub every night after work, and also drank alone in the house.
Sunday 5th of February 2012.
I decided I was sick of being sick of the unknown fears, and I was sick of wasting my life, Sunday I had enough drink to help me come down off it. Monday morning woke up feeling good and filled with a renewed determination that I have not felt since 2000. Made an appointment to see my GP who prescribed Campral I take 2 tablets three times a day. I then came across the my way out website by accident, well I don’t think it was an accident I think this is where god directed me.
Thursday 9th February 2012.
This is the start of day four Alcohol Free and looking forward to life and getting stronger with the help of the people on here.
I hope my story will be of some help to others, and many thanks for the nice welcome by the other members who have made me feel at home on this amazing website. Good luck to everyone and together we can beat this and have a better life Alcohol Free. :thanks:
Anyway that’s just some background information of where my relationship with alcohol began. I left school at 16 years of age got my first job, I also had my first drink at 16. Which was lager after one pint of lager I got a glow I feeling I had never experienced before, I felt relaxed and was able to talk to people.
My drinking really took off after I turned 21, I became a binge drinker at that time and would drink to get drunk and block things out from the past. This only made things worse, I lost many jobs, brought grief to my mum and dads life it affected my relationship with everyone who came into contact with me, I had my first girlfriend when I was 21, but all of my relationships were doomed to fail because of the underlying issues that I had. When I drank one or two I was the life and soul of the party, when I had to much, I became very low, resented the world hated everyone, had so much anger inside wanted to kill the people who had bullied me, and also just wished god would take me away from all of this.
At the age of 27 I met my future wife, who was a wonderful gentle caring loving person, a year later we got married, she had previously been married to a partner who was also addicted to alcohol, I hid my drink problem from her and told her I only liked a drink at the weekend, she had two children by her ex partner. We where happy to begin with but looking back now I destroyed her life and made my step kids life hell. My drinking eventually got worse and worse, again I lost jobs brought a lot of pain on both families. It was just all downhill after that.
In 2000 I came to a point in my life where I knew if I didn’t stop Id be dead soon, I had read in one of the daily newspapers about a new drug called Acamprosate (Campral) which helped take the craving ‘s for alcohol away. I went to my GP and asked if he would consider prescribing Campral for me, he advised me I would have to be referred to a counsellor before he would consider this, I was referred to an Addictions Counsellor, and this is when I realised how much damage the bullying at school had done to my life.
My GP prescribed a Librium detox to help take the edge of my withdrawal from alcohol, he then prescribed Campral for me, and it worked but it doesn’t work on its own, you need to have either one to one support or take up a new activity, and also change your lifestyle, I had to get rid of my old drinking buddies, who when I look back where not buddies, but like me only chasing the next drink and would become friends with who ever could help you get that next drink.
I was alcohol free till to 2005 when I went on holiday to Malta with my now ex wife, while there I decided that I could have a drink, and control it, which I did while on holiday but on returning home my drinking took off again I had some months alcohol free but then all went down hill again, this time I had affairs and started to gamble and amass debts, my marriage came to an end I lost my home and family, I again managed a period of abstinence, my ex wife became a good friend and my step kids got close, I joined a church was born again was happy and contented went to a support group once a week in the church, I had grandkids who I loved to bits, but once again I hit the drink, I wouldn’t drink when I was with my family, but I drank in the local pub every night after work, and also drank alone in the house.
Sunday 5th of February 2012.
I decided I was sick of being sick of the unknown fears, and I was sick of wasting my life, Sunday I had enough drink to help me come down off it. Monday morning woke up feeling good and filled with a renewed determination that I have not felt since 2000. Made an appointment to see my GP who prescribed Campral I take 2 tablets three times a day. I then came across the my way out website by accident, well I don’t think it was an accident I think this is where god directed me.
Thursday 9th February 2012.
This is the start of day four Alcohol Free and looking forward to life and getting stronger with the help of the people on here.
I hope my story will be of some help to others, and many thanks for the nice welcome by the other members who have made me feel at home on this amazing website. Good luck to everyone and together we can beat this and have a better life Alcohol Free. :thanks:
Comment