This is my first post here :new: - but I have been around here for quite a while!
I feel like a bit of fraud being on here as I am constantly humbled by the amazing tales I read on here - some of you are doing a fantastic job against powerful demons, I do not think I would have that strength!
I guess I am here because..... I just know it is time!
I want to moderate my drinking. I do not feel I want to go AF (yet?) - as I can not imagine my life without SOME alcohol. (This may change if things do not go well!)
My drinking may not be excessive by many peoples standards - but it has built up over a lot of years to the extent that it has become enough of a problem to me that I am posting here.
I am able to bluff my way thru life pretty effectively. I never get in a car with even 1 drink, I hold down a good job, my kids have never seen me "drunk" (altho' they rarely see me sober of an evening either!), and I rarely drink before 5 or 6 pm.
But - I am tired of being tired, hung over till mid morning and counting down the hours till evening comes so I can drink again.
I want to be able to look in a mirror after about 7pm without seeing that weird guy in there with that accusing "you are wasted AGAIN" look in his eyes!
I won't bore you with any more details right now, but I hope I can come by here fairly regularly just for someone to talk to about how things are going as I try to get my life back.
My aim is to be AF Sunday thru Wednesday and to drink like a "normal" person Thursday thru' Saturday
ie one to two drinks Thursday and Friday and possibly a couple more on a Saturday.
One of my main struggles is due to the fact that I live 55 (yes - I counted!) steps from a late opening store that sells ice-cold beer - and boy do these beers call out to me of an evening!
Wish me luck - I do not think I have been AF for more than two days in a row in twenty odd years!
With you guys help - that changes today.
Satori
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