New

[cke123]

So once again I get wasted and this morning I am crying and feelingbad about myself and having terrible panic attacks. I am so very sick of feeling this way all the time. I am 26 years old, and want to stop this behavior now. I have already been prescribed Topamax, what do I do now?

Thanks

[Lotus]

New

Welcome cke123

Glad you have found MWO. The support you will get here is tremendous.


Please don't feel bad. The fact is, that you realise what you are doing and are doing something about it. I'm the same age as you and I find that I have wasted so many years and so much money on alcohol.

Have you read "Just starting out" thread. It will help you understand more about the programme and help you decide what route you wish to take. Keep reading posts and keep posting. I hope to hear more from you.

All the best.

Mandy X

[cke123]

New

Thanks for responding, I cant help my feelings. Every day after drinking I can barely eat. I sit around and worry myself sick about what I may have said to people, or how I have offended them.

I hate it, but it seems so hard to simply quit, I have tried!

[weemelonhead]

New

Hi cke 123........yes you're right....the thought of quitting can seem hard.
I thought it was nigh on impossible for about 20 or so years......
Until I came here. I have been sober for every day that I have been a member at MWO....the information is invaluable, the advice about meds, supps, etc just fantastic...
And whats more...instead of it now seeming hard/unfaceable/impossible.......it is now an absolute JOY not to drink....I really am completely in love with the idea of never drinking again, instead of wondering what on earth my life would be like without the vino...

I used to KNOW that I shouldn't drink, but I never actually really WANTED to stop....after reading a whole LOAD of posts here from the long term abstainers, I realised that I was not allowing myself to approach this in any way that would be successful.
One of the main messages that seems to shine through on the LTA's posts, is that they have MADE a decision that they will NOT drink again....period...No excuses, never mind if someone dies, their partner leaves, they are in spiralling debt, the house is blown away in a hurricane....NO problems are EVER solved by booze...as an alcoholic, we just use them as an excuse to have a drink....that is the first thing to really stamp into the brain.
The second seems to be that alcohol is NOT something to miss....it is not a life enhancing fluid that should be grieved for...it is a POISON that harms your body/mind/relationships/life...WHY tell yourself that you miss it???? That is crazy surely??

Once I had assimilated these ideas from the fantastic posts here, I found my 'challenge' was no longer a huge mountain...it was much more of a freewheel.
This is not to say that every day is a booze free carnival filled with fun, laughter and joy, joy, joy....it isn't ......but turning my thinking around, and then reinforcing my decision with the help of the supps, the meds, a good diet and multi vits has meant that I CAN now see the wood for the trees......Every day, when I feel and see the results of not having a drink the night before...it strengthens my resolve even further...I am feeling so good...WHY would I want a substance that is going to destroy all of that??
My life is not in any way a picnic...I want to be able to deal with it all in the best way I can, without snowballing my problems by coating them in wine, and then shoving them under a clanking pile of empties....I am slowly starting to do this now...I've had ups and downs...but THAT decision is still there
I will NOT drink....whatever happens.....I will deal with this the same as any other buggar
SOBER...

Get reading my friend...find the information to get the old grey cells into gear...and use everything you need here.....
Your first step is a GREAT one
Good to see you.....:h Weemelon

[Rocky]

New

Cke
Welcome here at MWO..seeking a way to stop is a place in the journey you are on, and it is the first step to changing things.

Read as many posts as possible....Read the book if you have not yet... Try to get the supplements because they help your body heal and curb some of the cravings...make a list of why you want to stop...

Go at it one day at a time...

Best wishes to you...

[betty boop]

New

Hi cke & :welcome:

You have made the 1st step by coming here, there so many helpful supportive people who will help you get through this.

Love & Hugs :h :l :h

[DidItForMe]

New

Good, you got the Topa...now take it. It doesn't just hit you like a ton of bricks the first day, but in a few days...maybe a few weeks, I don't know, it will help BIG TIME. In the meanwhile, lean on the kudzu, the L-Glut, the supps/vits, and especially the folks here. Log on and talk your dear heart out. Read EVERYTHING!!! It will get better. Trust me, just by being here and taking this first step it HAS gotten better for you. You have more strength in you than you can even imagine. We are here for you!!!!

Many hugs comin' your way!!!

[cassy]

New

Hi cke123

Fantastic you chose to get on board with this site...i am exactly double your age and i wonder why i have travelled through all these years being so unaware that my social drinking would end up in alcoholism!!!!

I still am not ready to say never but am impressed by the posts i read here of people who are futher on the journey and can say NEVER AGAIN with confidence.

I still probably unrealistically would like to moderate but for now i need to get some self respect back ..so on day 33 and feel great.


good luck...can assure you I dont have much will power..hence drinking on and off in various patterns sine I was 16!!!


good Luck to you and just taking this first step means you are ready to make some changes in your life.

go for it and keep coming on the site for support ....Regards Cassy

[Guest]

New

Hi Weemelonhead

Am so glad I just read your post. I`ve been visiting this site moreso this past week, and your post has struck a chord. Am over half-way through my nightly bottle of sparkling white wine, my `nectar`.
Like I say, have been `checking in` to this site, but not really `listening`, telling myself I`ll stop drinking TOMORROW!!!!! Why tomorrow? That`s simple.......drink takes the edge off of things, only, what things?, `cos my life ain`t really so bad.
Now I know, it`s like you say, and am using every excuse under the sun to keep on drinking, which is both costly and self-destructing.
Thanks for your thoughts, because now I think I may just manage not to drink this coming evening...................
Regards, Starlight Impress

[Beaches]

New

Cke123,
Well you have found the right place to talk about all your fears because we have been there or are there. I first came here because I was so ashamed of my behavior and needed so desperately to change. I hope you stick around to keep getting the incredible support of all of the people here. It will make a difference, it did for me.

[STARLIGHT]

New

Hi, I am new here. I have been viewing for a couple of weeks. To afraid to post. I have been drinking to much wine for 25 years. I first read the MWO Book, then bought the CD's. went to my doctor to get topomax. He said "no" and wanted to put me on something else that would abstain me from drinking. I told him about the program and how I really wanted to try and moderate my drinking. It's a big part of our social life being near wine country and all. He did not feel comfortable going with this program. So, I then orderd the supplements and have been doing these for a week, along with the cd's. Seem to help a little. I would realy like to try the topamax but am to scared to go to see another doctor now. Any suggestions!

Thanks,

STARLIGHT

[msadventure]

New

STARLIGHT, is your doc opposed to your desire to moderate rather than abstain, or is he concerned about side effects from Topo? If it's the moderation he's opposed to, he's missing the boat. If he gives you the Topo, the worst case is that it doesn't work and you keep drinking like you are today. And if it does work, you end up reducing your intake. Who knows, you could even decide to abstain at some point. I would go to another doctor.

Msadventure

[tea]

New

Hi Chickadee and Starlight, 'WELCOME TO OUR WORLD, WON'T YOU COME RIGHT IN'..... you have found the place for you, keep looking in, post when you feel like it, ALWAYS someone here for you. Have a look at the Senior members posts and perhaps a wee look at Nancy's posts in What We Believe, whatever works for you. There is something her for EVERYONE! Honestly I feel so at home here,like I have at last found my kindred spirits. WELCOME, WELCOME.

Lorna