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Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

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    #31
    Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

    And the main thing is that you have had enough and quit.... This puts you in a much stronger position (both personally and in your marriage) to deal with your problems and work things out. I really feel for you and hope that you guys can work through this. Stay strong x
    AF since Halloween 2016

    Trying to kill my Wine Witch! :smileyb:

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      #32
      Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

      Thank you for the supportive messages
      This time i've had enough of it, I was seriously sick of the booze anyway but i think you then "this will be the last time so i'll have a big night, i'll give up tomorrow (but they just don't stop)"
      To me they're cries for help i think
      Anyway its in the past now, time for self bashing is over as you say use this as energy. And as many posters have said on this wonderful forum it can only come from selfwithin.
      Re:alcoholism and understanding, somehow us binge drinkers seem to be accepted by society bizarrely when deep down any binge drinker really knows they have got an issue with it
      :thanks:

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        #33
        Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

        Hi WTF.

        I recommend you have a good long read of our toolbox thread friend. Click on the link.

        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

        Keep it simple, and get yourself a plan that you can handle. Firstly, as you know, we must want to stop the madness and get off the booze. And you can.

        So -

        1. Do you want this, to stop drinking and stay stopped?

        2. Are you willing to ask a doctor or nurse for help? And/or Will your partner be on board with you in support if you say you want to stop drinking and stay stopped?

        3. Are you prepared to do whatever it takes to get and stay sober, and i mean whatever it takes?

        Just a couple of idea's friend. We all must find what works for us best.

        Best wishes, and go for it, because you can.

        G bloke.

        'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

        Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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          #34
          Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

          Thanks G Bloke

          Well gonna give it a good go this time, thanks for the encouragement and toolbox thread.

          Made the list of negatives related to alcohol, gee its a big one...

          Would appreciate some ideas on how all of you got around the social pressure put on when in a bar or with work related events

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            #35
            Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

            I tell you what folks, its amazing what a few days AF does to the mind, body and spirit

            :wave::wave::wave::wave:

            Massive respect to you all for your help and advice

            great community
            :thanks:

            Long may it continue

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              #36
              Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

              You can do it!

              Lick your wounds.
              Get back on track.
              Move forward.
              You have done it before and you can do it again.
              Hurry up and get yourself back to the good place where life is a million times better.
              You can do it!

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                #37
                Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

                Dear Friends,
                I thought I would update this thread.
                AF since my last few posts on this thread.
                Lots of introspection and compassion for oneself.
                Some bad days during this time but mostly great days.
                With this freedom comes self-esteem, dignity, strength, courage, aspiration, inspiration, love, kindness and joy.
                I'm practicing forgiveness but its not always easy. Both to forgive myself and the "friends" who still take great pleasure in telling anyone who will listen about my misfortune. Forgiving them is the hardest part, they watched me drown.
                Without forgiveness my anger will only burn a hole in my soul. Its time to be my own angel.

                For anyone who is thinking about going AF, I say to paraphrase Nike
                "Just do it"
                You will not regret it.
                It will let you "be the best you can be"
                Remove yourself from this lock-in, mind altering, soul destroying, life changing toxin.
                There does come a point when you literally no longer think about it or "need it."

                I thank you for being here when I needed it. You are my angels, the internet angels.
                Its my turn to be an angel not only to myself but others.

                Thank you deeply from the bottom of my heart.

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                  #38
                  Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

                  So glad to hear the update!
                  For us, AL is nothing but a death trap...so glad you were able to climb out. Ongoing support is important, are you getting it? Byrdie
                  All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                  Tool Box
                  Newbie's Nest

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                    #39
                    Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

                    Hi Brydlady

                    Thanks for your kind wishes.

                    Yeah to climb out is amazing, its like looking down at everybody from above drinking and wasting their lives. Its transcending in a way.

                    You want to shout at them "What are you doing? Don't you realise its the same routine and crap you've been doing for decades..." but they don't listen so I don't preach. Nobody likes a reformed drinker, they think i'm the one with the problem not them... I'll leave them to their locked in routines and cycles.

                    Regarding on-going support, I think it needs to come from inside. Time to be our own angels. I'm well passed the usual I feel great stage, I'll just have a couple of drinks.

                    The low feelings just need to be accepted and moved on. Resisting them and looking for non lasting relief via drink, food etc... is just pointless. As the relief is only fleeting. Self medication literally needs to be one's self.

                    I do have people I can talk to now if I require (but they are not AF people)

                    I'm imagine the longer AF abstainers might have some more insight into some common pitfalls that may come along the way.

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                      #40
                      Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

                      What a wonderful story with a happy ending. I read through it and was routing for you all the way. You've now got one year sober and have beat the beast. I'm at day 110 and look so forward to my one year mark. Life is wonderful and we want all drinkers to experience it... but, like you say, we can't be those holier-than-thou vigil antes ... LOL...

                      Take care and thanks so much for the inspiration.
                      "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                      Lao-Tzu

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                        #41
                        Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

                        Thanks SoberSoul for your kind note. It really does make a difference when you know that out there in the universe (internet) people have got your back.

                        110 days that's brilliant!

                        I like to think that after a while it just becomes a non-issue, being AF. I think a lot of people now look on with envy but they dare not admit it to me. Harping on that I have the problem.

                        There was for me at least a certain mourning period with my drinking "friends" when they realized I would not be going back to the repetitious cycle of drinking.

                        I don't miss the headaches. I don't miss the low self esteem. I don't miss drinking with people you don't actually have anything in common with (except the drink). I don't miss the hole in the pocket. I don't miss the melancholy. I don't miss the short buzz when drunk. I don't miss the waste of time. I love the fact that you can drive home after going out or have the availability to do something else as you are not inebriated.

                        P.s love the Lao-Tzu quote.

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                          #42
                          Drunk, Derailed, Diabolical and Devastation once again

                          Doggygirl;n2093985 wrote: Hi WTF. Isn't it amazing how quickly we can forget the pain?

                          Being a non-drinker was so hard at first. Physical cravings. Mind games. Social pressures. On and on. I can only say that stopping the madness with alcohol was the second best thing I ever did. The BEST thing I ever did was quit smoking cigarettes. But it's a close tie between the two.

                          As the years go by and I am farther and farther from that lifestyle, and continue finding the REAL ME under all that old garbage, the happier I am. I'm a better wife, daughter, friend, employee, student, mentor, neighbor, member of society than I ever could be with alcohol ruling my life.

                          Quit. You will not regret it. At least not once you get far enough away from it.

                          DG
                          Doggygirl, I am three days in.

                          THis is so helpful. I spent two years AF and 'slipped back into it'. It is SO easy to do. So hard to give up, yet SO EASY to slip back again.

                          I know this though, having achieved sobriety once in my life and relapsed. I keep reminding myself this time, that even a 'shandy' and I am drinking again.

                          For me, I know I have to stop drinking completely. There are going to be a huge number of mental challenges.

                          I had a hot sweat night sleep last night. But feel free this morning. I want to can this feeling and keep it with me all day.

                          I feel strong today. I hope this continues.

                          Musomatt

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                            #43
                            Wow that was a great experience DG it so inspirational. thank you for sharing it. Keep it up!

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