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    I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

    Hello, i am a newbie, i realize you all have heard it all before, but this is my story.

    Im a 38 year old man, married with 3 kids. I am a functioning alchoholic, dont miss work and to anyone besides my family would know im a drunk. I drink from the time i get home till the time a pass out. EVERYDAY, i have gained weight from drinking and eating late at night, and have done some very embarrasing things that i am to ashamed to admit.

    I am amazed that my wife hasnt left me, if i were her i dont know if i could have done the same.

    I want my life back, tired of being depressed and tired of spending 50.00 a week on rum and diet coke.

    How does anyone function with out alcohol? Thats my biggest fear, how am i gonna live with out being intoxicated?

    Thanks for letting me share, any advice on my first step would be great.
    Its strange being sober; huh, so this is how normal people are :H

    #2
    I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

    Hi Captain!
    Rum is my downfall too. The first step? It appears you have taken it by posting here. I would encourage you to read the book and keep reading posts here as well as posting yourself. I am glad you found us.
    Take Care
    "Keep your eyes and heart focused on the end goal at all times, and never settle for less."

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      #3
      I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

      Hey Captain,

      :welcome:

      Count me in on the rum as my favorite. Almost named myself rumrunner but felt I would work my way past it!! It does get super expensive drinking constantly. No one knew in my case either. Even my husband had no idea the extent of the bottles I would buy and sneak.

      Beaches, is right, read the book. You can do it! You just have to decide the time is right. Get the supplements, and CD's. post away, this place helps turn your life around.

      :l Mary

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        #4
        I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

        Hi Captain, yes Rum was my downfall too, White Rum, or voddy, or Gin or or or or, welcome you are in the right place at the right time, keep logging in, keep posting and looking into what our senior members have to say. Hugs to you.

        Lorna xx
        Rather die standing, than live on my knees, begging Please..... No More.......

        Comment


          #5
          I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

          Hey Captain:
          While Voddy is my first mate, I can understand your desire to get out of your Rum situation. I function too. Married, kids, job, drunk. Read the book. Keep reading the posts here and let us know how you are doing. I was amazed at all the support I got from folks all over the world. you will be too. I was scared to death to think that I had to give up drinking, wasn't sure I could. We can all do this together. Hang in there!!!
          Learning to live life on the outside of a bottle. :flower:

          Comment


            #6
            I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

            You have already taken the first couple of steps ...

            Facing there is a problem ...

            And then finding these forums ...

            None of us have been perfect, but you will find great support in the people here as you start taking your life and control back .

            Stay close here, and raed & post often. It really can help you to focus ... trust me, I know ... I'm finally back and wonder why I ever left.

            Welcome!

            WTE

            Comment


              #7
              I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

              good morning Captain Morgan

              That is a vile feeling to get chained to the rum bottle isnt it..as everyone has said ..keep getting on here for support.

              maybe on your first day alcohol free you could do something with the kids..go swim.. bike ride, walk,,,you said you wanted to lose weight.??


              i got a magnifier mirroe and had a good look at my skin on my face the day before i stopped drinking (I set a goal of 40 days....Lent)

              then i stripped off and examined the damage...I.m 52 .. a few wobbly bits!!i weighed myself and recorded it on my calender.


              next to the fridge...out with the crap...bought tropical fruits, healthy stuff...and millions of soft drinks.

              looked at the calender and thought Oh well its February so maybe i get to look and feel better by easter if I quit the booze for a while ...SUPRISE SUPRISE people have started to say "you look different/ good etc) I.m no oil painting but I do feel better.


              what about your wife???Can you get her on board with you not drinking(dont know if she does the boooze too)If not can she support you in some way.


              Before bed it helps me to get a bubbly bath, I,m all teeth fossed, moisturised and ready to flop into bed with my newly sober hubby and my newly sober self!!!

              Nothing worse than smelling of booze going to bed..when i look back I consider the sight of me flopping into bed, half sloshed, bad breath, make up still on, teeth not brushed maybe.....tehn comes farting and snoring(well the alcohol fumes have to come out somewhere I guess)

              Picture yourself healthier, and booze free....just try it today and thats the first step to change....hope it works as the alternative is to get fatter, and unhappier... and distancing from your wife and kids, friends...we addicts can go to a dark place physically and mentally ..you have reached for the lifeline i think??

              Good Luck today....Regards Cassy

              Ps I am on day 37 of no booze..no way am i sure I wont drink again and still want to moderate maybe..HOWEVER for me having some alcohol free days has won back my self respect and will to get heathier/ happier and hopefully be of some support to others who have got similar problems.

              Comment


                #8
                I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

                Morning Cap'n

                I too was a high functioning drunk - altho it was beer that was my poison.

                I could not see how I could function without alcohol - but it is the alcohol that makes it look like that.
                I drank excessively for more than 20 years, latterly like you - every night from coming home until crashing out / passing out.

                Two Months after I made the decision that it couldn't go on - it feels like I got a whole new life - seriously - it is that much better WITHOUT the alcohol. I am going around with a silly grin on my face for a lot of the time! I feel so much mor ALIVE!

                The first couple of weeks are tough - but it gets easier the longer you stay away from the booze.

                You owe it to yourself and your family to give it a try!
                The support you will get here is invaluable - when I was struggleng, - the folks on here got me through it. They changed my life - literally.
                We are here to help - we have all been there - you just need to make the decision to go for it.

                Best of Luck

                Satori
                "Though there are many paths at the foot of the mountain - all those who reach the top see the same moon - as any fule kno"

                Comment


                  #9
                  I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

                  Well Captn..
                  if you are sick of it.. then work like a dog to stop it... dont just say you are sick of it.. get your program together and work with everything you have and all your determination and climb your way out.

                  as satori says, the first bit is hard, but read peoples elation when they get past it..

                  as to life without alcohol.. its FANTASTIC. life with alcohol is lonely sad and desperate and it shows in your own post.

                  come and join the new life

                  you CAN.
                  welcome.
                  Brigid

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

                    Wow, thanks to all of you for the kind words of encouragement. I have scheduled an appointment with my Dr on Wednesday and plan on asking him for a prescription for Topamax. I will be ordering the CD's today.

                    Thanks again
                    Its strange being sober; huh, so this is how normal people are :H

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

                      Great news captain...what about today??? Do you have a cunning plan to be sober so that you can turn up at the doctors with day one under your expanding belt??

                      Why not try for this evening to do something, anything but reach for the rum...I,m sure your wife and kids would appreciate that too?

                      if not cut it by half tonight...but be honest.

                      If the best you can do today is get the tapes and make a doctors appointment..well congratulate yourself...that is the first huge hurdle you just jumped over...keep going we all want to support you ..these first days are tough but keep the plan going.


                      good Luck Captain and keep posting..dont worry if its not plain sailing..for many of us it wont be...we have donkeys years of conditioning to unpick!!

                      Bye for now Cassy

                      Comment


                        #12
                        I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

                        Hi Captain

                        Welcome to MWO. Firstly you have admitted to drinking and secondly you have realised how much it is costing you (I did that and realised I nearly spent ?30000 on fags and booze alone - I'm sure I've got a thread on "how much have you spent?").

                        Try to change your routine, instead of going home and drinking, maybe spend some time with your kids or wife. Go out for the evening. However, don't beat yourself up. We have all had times where we have lapsed. I'm on day 6 AF yet when I was drinking I could not imagine NOT drinking. It was as if my evening would not be complete.

                        I hope the doctors appointment goes well and remember to lean on us whether you want to have a moan or whinge etc.

                        All the best.
                        Mandy x

                        Comment


                          #13
                          I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

                          How do you do it? One way is this program. many are doing what you wonder how you will do it. They stared asking the same question...

                          Read the book...and start off to a new you
                          Control the Mind

                          Comment


                            #14
                            I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

                            Rocky;112532 wrote: How do you do it? One way is this program. many are doing what you wonder how you will do it. They stared asking the same question...

                            Read the book...and start off to a new you
                            I just downloaded and printed the book, ordered the 4 set CD's. I am starting to quit tonight.

                            I am sick and tired of it, and now i am gonna do something about it.

                            Thanks
                            Its strange being sober; huh, so this is how normal people are :H

                            Comment


                              #15
                              I am sick and tired of feeling like shit

                              Captain, I am proud of you. today is my one year anniversary here at MWO. I posted that thread under long term moderators. Seeing as we both loved the rum, it may help you to see what tools have helped me along my path!! Congrats for taking this on!!

                              Much success to you!!

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