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    dont want to drink tonte,please read

    hi,
    have been on here before,but life been awful no job etc...so been drinking and smoking my socks off,going to bed all the time,waking up an anxious mess coz im on antidepressants too,ive drank for 25 years practically every night,its got worse lately!! got a hol booked in 10 weeks so need to lose a stone or s0,my fat is cider and wine fat!! i just cant imagine a day with out booze the days are so long,want my anx and depression to go!! i know its a vicious circle i drink coz im depressed then im depressed coz i drink,i just want to wake up tomoz knowing i went a nte with out al..i cant see the wood for the trees please ne tips or advice?i have been on the newbies nest,i just dont know what im going to do this eve if im not drinking.xx

    #2
    dont want to drink tonte,please read

    its also upsetting my kids,first thing my 12 year old says after school is are you going to bed mummy,are you down today,and i wont make ne plans after 3 o clock case ive started drinking!!hate myself soooo much

    Comment


      #3
      dont want to drink tonte,please read

      You sound like you're spinning like a top..... Slow down and write about what's going on with you and spend the time to compose your thoughts.
      It allows people who have similar experiences to share ideas with you, but also helps you to gain clarity..... Compose, and keep composing until you've shared all you have of yourself.

      You might actually learn more doing so than anyone could ever offer you.

      I'm new, but I'm trying to do the same.... feel rather peaceful in this moment actually!
      Heaven is high and earth wide. If you ride three feet higher above the ground than other men, you will know what that means.

      Comment


        #4
        dont want to drink tonte,please read

        write a book on here, I'll read it and problem solve with you..... If you want to come back every hour on the hour and share ideas, I'll check in on you!
        You could help me not to drink tonight too!
        Heaven is high and earth wide. If you ride three feet higher above the ground than other men, you will know what that means.

        Comment


          #5
          dont want to drink tonte,please read

          I stayed on here all night through the time I drink and survived just by sharing, have to catch some zzzzz's now.... Hope to see a lot more about you when I return!
          Heaven is high and earth wide. If you ride three feet higher above the ground than other men, you will know what that means.

          Comment


            #6
            dont want to drink tonte,please read

            bimble01;1498549 wrote: its also upsetting my kids,first thing my 12 year old says after school is are you going to bed mummy,are you down today,and i wont make ne plans after 3 o clock case ive started drinking!!hate myself soooo much

            Might I suggest using that as motivation. Sometimes if you can grab a hold of something powerful enough, it does the trick.

            Visualize in your minds eye, the look of your children at their happiest, the next time you feel the urge to reach for the bottle, and the joy they will have when you are sober. The trick to beating AL, IMO anyway, is to just get past if for a little while. Small battles go along way to winning the war. It will get easier, the more you do it.

            It CAN be done, if and when, YOU are truly ready for it. There is a myriad of techniques/ideas/supplements. Hang around here, try them all, and use the ones that work for you.

            Small goals.........1 day, then 7 days, then the ever popular 30(this one holds some sort of magical power or something LOL) You will build on your success, and before you know it....boom, you have whipped the demons azz for 30 days!
            Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




            DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

            Comment


              #7
              dont want to drink tonte,please read

              thanks you two,will keep posting,got to do this,want my life back,and my figure!ha

              Comment


                #8
                dont want to drink tonte,please read

                bimble01;1498572 wrote: thanks you two,will keep posting,got to do this,want my life back,and my figure!ha
                Good luck getting the figure back! I don't know what your eating habits while drinking have been like, but if you begin an exercise regimen, make sure you've regained your appetite. I used to weight train regularly before my last bender. During that bender, my diet consisted mostly of vodka and ginger ale (to settle the stomach) and maybe a few bites of food here and there. Some days I only drank. Anyway, I tried to resume exercising a little too quickly and passed out (and not because I was drunk!) at the gym. I'd never fainted in my entire life prior to that.
                In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

                Comment


                  #9
                  dont want to drink tonte,please read

                  Many of us have a way of wanting it all right now. Then when it doesn't happen we lose hope, give up. Its a part of society, culture.... Us alkies, & problem drinkers tend to be in a bit more of a hurry it seems, but "time takes time". "Time is a gift ~ not a threat". Focus FIRST on sobriety ~ recovery from alcohol addiction, first & foremost!... This is the priority!... Whatever else is second, at least for a good period of time. It's not really that long...

                  Time is flying by anyway & we've been wasting it. I don't think we want to waste any more of it. It's to precious & valuable. In fact there sometimes doesn't seem like there's enough of it, but there is. So, lets make good use of what we do have.

                  Many of us gals put on weight, or let are selves go a bit... That will come to in time, we promise you!... Remember time is now on our side, our friend. Besides you are just lovely as it is!...

                  You may be quite hungry in the beginning of your sobriety ~ recovery. This is very typical. It's OK, don't worry!.... Plz don't give yourself a hard time!!!!... Your body & brain needs nutrition & repair work!!!.. This is very important!.... Trust us on this. We care for you & have been there.

                  Please treat yourself to little rewards at the end of the week. Just something little, it doesn't have to be big. We can have a little fun getting sober if you want. Within a week you will be feeling better hun. Take our hands of support, our hearts of love, wrap yourself up with hope here & elsewhere if you choose.

                  I was a very seriously ill drunk! I could barley get to the grocery store every two weeks at the end. Took a while just to make the list. I couldn't concentrate & was quite depressed.

                  I almost died more then once from this addiction. It's been a very long journey. Look at me almost a year sober! Oh my Gawd, I can hardly believe it bimble01. I could never have done it without MWO. I've had several other stops, diff treatment types, along my journey.

                  If I can, you can to. You are worth it, you are important, you absolutely deserve this sober life!!!.... You can recover from addiction. Hang on for the ride. There is hope. I promise you, you can do it!... Life will be way, way better, not perfect, but way better!...

                  Each one of you is lovable & beautiful!!! :l :h

                  You Can Do It!..... Expect A Miracle!.....

                  Comment


                    #10
                    dont want to drink tonte,please read

                    that was a lovely reply,thankyou x

                    Comment


                      #11
                      dont want to drink tonte,please read

                      bimble01;1498547 wrote: hi,
                      have been on here before,but life been awful no job etc...so been drinking and smoking my socks off,going to bed all the time,waking up an anxious mess coz im on antidepressants too,ive drank for 25 years practically every night,its got worse lately!! got a hol booked in 10 weeks so need to lose a stone or s0,my fat is cider and wine fat!! i just cant imagine a day with out booze the days are so long,want my anx and depression to go!! i know its a vicious circle i drink coz im depressed then im depressed coz i drink,i just want to wake up tomoz knowing i went a nte with out al..i cant see the wood for the trees please ne tips or advice?i have been on the newbies nest,i just dont know what im going to do this eve if im not drinking.xx
                      You, me & so many of us did this, until we finally said we want our life's back. The going back in fourth is enough to drive any one nuts. Alcohol is the great deceiver! We reached out & said please help me, I can't live like this anymore!... Just like you did. It takes grrt courage to do this bimble01. This vicious circle is eating me alive! I'm sick of being depressed, can't see the forest thru the trees. Oh yeah gotcha.

                      Ah, I will never forget friend. Some who read this may understand when I say It's Easier To Stay Stopped, Then It Is To Start Over!!! I found my way out & I'm not going back to hell again & I do it one day at a time!. Tho I have times I also tell my self, that I won't say never, cause I said that a gazillion times & failed. I use both analogies, for diff scenarios.

                      You most likely know alcohol is a depressant drug & will make your depression worse!... Ugh, I remember. I still have times where I'm depressed, but not anything like it was when I was drinking. I have tools, I Use that help me cope today. One is it's OK to actually feel down about some things, I just drink over them now.

                      What are you going to do each night, afternoon your not drinking? Your going to begin the process of coming out of the dark forest. Like so many of have done. You aren't going to be doing this alone. You have us with you bimble01. Before you know it you will see less trees, & light appearing. Add anything else visual into this if it helps. I do this meditation for myself, when I'm not there F2F.

                      Some of the depression that is being caused from the alcohol ~ ethanol ~ poison is going to subside. You will start to look in the mirror again & see bimble01 smiling again. ) . She will know she is lovable, capable & stronger then she first believed. For she has been thru a 25 yr battle of "Alcohell ". She will survive, she will heal, she will find victory! Yes, she can & she will!.... )

                      bimble01;1498549 wrote: its also upsetting my kids,first thing my 12 year old says after school is are you going to bed mummy,are you down today,and i wont make ne plans after 3 o clock case ive started drinking!!hate myself soooo much
                      I remember this to & it got even worse later bimble01. You don't have to let that happen! Take action & you can get your life back starting now. First get all alcohol out of your home. Go back to the Newbies Nest. I also found seeking F2F support help important, but not everyone needs this, or wants it. Don't let alcohol rob one more day of your & your precious families life!.... You don't have to drink again. You can & will regain your self respect. Your sadness will fade away in less time then you realize.

                      bimble01;1498572 wrote:
                      thanks you two,will keep posting,got to do this,want my life back,and my figure!ha
                      Yes, you do, you can, you will bimble01. Keep reading & posting! You will get your life back!....

                      bimble01;1498996 wrote:
                      that was a lovely reply,thankyou x
                      Your welcome from the good hearts of MWO. Bimble01 your loved, your special, as we all are here at MWO. :h

                      Lets get sober, rock this recovery, get busy livin.... )

                      Comment


                        #12
                        dont want to drink tonte,please read

                        Hi Bimble!
                        How are you doing today?
                        :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

                        Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          dont want to drink tonte,please read

                          Good Morning Bimble01, Or Maybe It's Evening In Your Land,

                          Hope your beginning to feel a little better? Hope I didn't type out to many words, I sometimes have a bad habit of doing that. I'm sorry!.... I know Mr. Wilde can testify & will either be shaking his head & saying yes dear, but inside he's prob either :H or :upset: or .

                          Anway, in 10 wks you have a hotel booked & it sounds like fun! Hope you've had a chance to read around, & gain some hope, inspiration, commonalities we all share. That you can become sober, stop hating yourself.

                          I know I did! I have a busy day today. I have hope today. I don't hate myself, I don't like myself all the time, but most the time I do.

                          There's also The One Step Thread & The Topamax Friendship Thread & you don't have to be taking Topa. I sometimes wonder why I don't post there? I kind float around a bit. But, all the peeps are super nice, no judgement!!!....

                          Hope when you have time, feel like, or want to you will check in. Oh & I think there's a couple newer Mom type threads just starting out, under Starting Out. Some days I just like to read, some days I'm so busy living & don't get on the PC either now.

                          Bimble01. I ~ we are rooting for you! You can do this, you will be amazed how grrt sobriety life is! :l


                          PS. It's alcohol that makes us not like ourselves. I'm getting even with it. I'm staying sober ~ rockin my recovery!.... :-)

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