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    #61
    No Drink til Download!

    I can really sympathise with you having a bi-polar mother as I do to... I am 41 now but finally had therapy six months ago trying to deal with the upset it caused me as a child (over doses by her etc.). Have you had therapy?

    Personally, I think you need to quit the booze or at least reduce it right down before you can heal as it will always get in the way and as my therapist says cover over the emotions but they are still there....

    I wish you all the best in whatever route you take xo
    AF since Halloween 2016

    Trying to kill my Wine Witch! :smileyb:

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      #62
      No Drink til Download!

      my fiance just told me he'd leave me if i don't sort this out

      please tell me how to feel.
      I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

      To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

      18.08.13

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        #63
        No Drink til Download!

        Inchy...our answer will depend on one thing...are you drinking now?

        I don't have to tell you we are all mourning the loss of Vachkiri....AL is not a game. For us, we either give in to it, or fight it....it comes down to those 2 choices. Your BF is seeing what is happening to you as a result of AL. You have some big choices to make...and most all of us have been right where you are. I hope you choose to live without AL. As you can see, all it brings is pain and despair.
        Byrdie
        All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
        Tool Box
        Newbie's Nest

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          #64
          No Drink til Download!

          InChains;1509249 wrote: my fiance just told me he'd leave me if i don't sort this out

          please tell me how to feel.
          Hi Inchy. Only you can know how you feel. I can say that in my professional experience, most often the loved ones of the addicted people feel frustrated and afraid. They realize at some point they are powerless over the addict. They are helpless to impact change - only the addict can decide to change. Often times a loved one will determine that by staying with the addict when the addict is NOT changing, they are enabling the situation. While it is usually a very difficult decision for the loved one to walk away, that is often the necessary solution if they don't want to spend their life caught up in the insanity of addiction.

          I haven't met you or your fiance in person so I don't know if those generalizations are true of your situation. I will say it seems your fiance has stood by you for a long time now, and that would seem to be evidence that he cares for you a great deal.

          I think this would be an excellent time to pursue treatment since trying to stop on your own, and trying to stop with the help of MWO has not worked thus far.

          Never give up.

          :h:l

          DG
          Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
          Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

          One day at a time.

          Comment

            #65
            No Drink til Download!

            If you are drinking then you won't know how to feel, quitting, getting sober involves learning to feel again. It's a bit of a rollercoaster and takes time but well worth it - you'll stop feeling so lost and alone.
            I used the Sinclair Method to beat my alcoholic drinking.

            Drank within safe limits for almost 2 years

            AF date 22/07/13

            Comment

              #66
              No Drink til Download!

              Dear Inchy,
              I've been out of email/internet contact for two weeks, but as soon as I got access again today, wanted to check in on how you are doing. I echo Doggy Girl and Ukblonde's comments. You are too talented, smart, caring a person to let Alcohol rob you of your life, friendships, joy. Join the rest of us in working to slay this beast. Free.
              Free at Last
              "What you seek is seeking you." -- Rumi

              Highly recommend this video
              http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html

              July 19, 2013 -- the beginning of being Free at Last

              Comment

                #67
                No Drink til Download!

                thank you everybody, I know my other half only did it because he cares. I am stopping again tomorrow, I'm not thinking about the future, just that day.

                for those other than dg, who being truly lovely kept what I've told her private - I am seeking treatment on wednesday next week. a drop in centre, my other half is taking me.
                I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

                To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

                18.08.13

                Comment

                  #68
                  No Drink til Download!

                  In Chains, this is good to hear. Please stay close to your friends here, we are pulling for you.
                  Free at Last
                  "What you seek is seeking you." -- Rumi

                  Highly recommend this video
                  http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html

                  July 19, 2013 -- the beginning of being Free at Last

                  Comment

                    #69
                    No Drink til Download!

                    Hey Inchy, just checking in to see how you are doing?
                    Free at Last
                    "What you seek is seeking you." -- Rumi

                    Highly recommend this video
                    http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html

                    July 19, 2013 -- the beginning of being Free at Last

                    Comment

                      #70
                      No Drink til Download!

                      hey free, i shut down the journal for a few days, needed some private time - I'm now on day 7 AF, feeling real good about it too, I'll probably start journaling again later
                      I have faced it, a life wasted, and I am never going back there again

                      To ya'll my name is inchy. I am an alcoholic - and priority number one is making it to the end of this day AF. No excuses.

                      18.08.13

                      Comment

                        #71
                        No Drink til Download!

                        Hi Inchy!
                        7 days AF is great! I hope you are doing ok. Check in when you can! :h:h
                        :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

                        Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

                        Comment

                          #72
                          No Drink til Download!

                          Yay, 7 days that's excellent. Know what you mean about having space, take your time and do what you need to do.

                          How do you feel?
                          I used the Sinclair Method to beat my alcoholic drinking.

                          Drank within safe limits for almost 2 years

                          AF date 22/07/13

                          Comment

                            #73
                            No Drink til Download!

                            Inchy, understand the need for space. I travel a lot for work and have days where I have limited email connections, and it's actually kind of freeing.

                            So happy for you with 7 days AF. You will feel better with every AF day you attain.

                            Wonderful news!
                            Free at Last
                            "What you seek is seeking you." -- Rumi

                            Highly recommend this video
                            http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html

                            July 19, 2013 -- the beginning of being Free at Last

                            Comment

                              #74
                              No Drink til Download!

                              Carrycash, I have reported you for spam because of your signature and you actively are promoting buying alcohol in another thread. If you want help to quit drinking or are here for support, change your signature.
                              Well it's all right now. I've learned my lesson well. You see you can't please everyone, so you've got to please yourself.

                              Comment

                                #75
                                No Drink til Download!

                                Hi Inchy, just back from a long bout of travel and checking to see how you are doing. Your festival should be on about now, yes? Sending you lots of positive vibes.
                                Free at Last
                                "What you seek is seeking you." -- Rumi

                                Highly recommend this video
                                http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html

                                July 19, 2013 -- the beginning of being Free at Last

                                Comment

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