drunken girl's story
I thought about this the other night, maybe a month ago. "holly sss... I have been drinking heavily and adjusting my lifestyle around my drinking since I was about 24".
going to parties and getting completely drunk and having a blast, waking up the next day hungover and thinking, where is the next party and if I can't find one, i'll have a solo one.
I don't do early mornings because I love to stay up till 2am drinking with my boyfriend or going to the local dive. I don't have kids and my boyfriend is also a boozer. I like being high, really high on wine. I make jokes about it and my drunken friends laugh with me.
Sometimes I skip on meals because I don't want to spoil my buzz.
everything I have been doing for the past 15 years has included large amounts of alcohol.
all my lovers in the past 15 years have been drinkers. I surround myself with drunks. I love music about drinking and being drunk.
sometimes I drink in the afternoon on Saturdays and Sundays.
I drink like an old spanish sailor. I have very high tolerance to booze. I can throw back a whole bottle of wine and be nice and drunk and also fun to be around. then throw back ciders and maybe even a shot. (yeah am also 5'-3"). My favorite is wine but I just about drink anything err except for lighter fluid.
I have never tried to quit because I don't fit into the category of the drunk who blacks out and wakes up in jail or in a strangers bed or who's life is falling apart.
I am a lot of fun when i'm drunk and people find me amusing. I flirt I dance I stay up till the wee hours of the morning partying. I also have no qualms about getting a couple bottles and drinking by myself, or going to bars alone, I especially love dives, really grungy dives.
Some times I get absolutely spinning drunk and make sure that I announce to the crowd that I am officially drunk
I am a seasoned drunk and I love my wine. Just like a a lot of blues songs say.
In the last few months I started thinking, I like wine and I enjoy having fun, but if I keep this up, things are going to get ugly. I have crazy mood swings and I know it's the booze. I know the mood swings are my body telling me to cut heavily on the drink.
If I go to AA they are going to tell me to come back when I hit bottom, and that, I do not want to do. I just want to take control of this thing before it gets out of hand, and I know it will because I can't seem to stop . I am trying right now, and one part of my brain is saying, " go get some wine drunken girl it's Saturday".
I am having a strong craving that am trying to control. ha! and I thought I was the amazing drunken girl who is in control of her drinking.
That's why am here, to learn to slow down and use this energy creatively I know I can channel it positively. but it's hard, and I feel like I need support to slow down this crazy party.
I thought about this the other night, maybe a month ago. "holly sss... I have been drinking heavily and adjusting my lifestyle around my drinking since I was about 24".
going to parties and getting completely drunk and having a blast, waking up the next day hungover and thinking, where is the next party and if I can't find one, i'll have a solo one.
I don't do early mornings because I love to stay up till 2am drinking with my boyfriend or going to the local dive. I don't have kids and my boyfriend is also a boozer. I like being high, really high on wine. I make jokes about it and my drunken friends laugh with me.
Sometimes I skip on meals because I don't want to spoil my buzz.
everything I have been doing for the past 15 years has included large amounts of alcohol.
all my lovers in the past 15 years have been drinkers. I surround myself with drunks. I love music about drinking and being drunk.
sometimes I drink in the afternoon on Saturdays and Sundays.
I drink like an old spanish sailor. I have very high tolerance to booze. I can throw back a whole bottle of wine and be nice and drunk and also fun to be around. then throw back ciders and maybe even a shot. (yeah am also 5'-3"). My favorite is wine but I just about drink anything err except for lighter fluid.
I have never tried to quit because I don't fit into the category of the drunk who blacks out and wakes up in jail or in a strangers bed or who's life is falling apart.
I am a lot of fun when i'm drunk and people find me amusing. I flirt I dance I stay up till the wee hours of the morning partying. I also have no qualms about getting a couple bottles and drinking by myself, or going to bars alone, I especially love dives, really grungy dives.
Some times I get absolutely spinning drunk and make sure that I announce to the crowd that I am officially drunk
I am a seasoned drunk and I love my wine. Just like a a lot of blues songs say.
In the last few months I started thinking, I like wine and I enjoy having fun, but if I keep this up, things are going to get ugly. I have crazy mood swings and I know it's the booze. I know the mood swings are my body telling me to cut heavily on the drink.
If I go to AA they are going to tell me to come back when I hit bottom, and that, I do not want to do. I just want to take control of this thing before it gets out of hand, and I know it will because I can't seem to stop . I am trying right now, and one part of my brain is saying, " go get some wine drunken girl it's Saturday".
I am having a strong craving that am trying to control. ha! and I thought I was the amazing drunken girl who is in control of her drinking.
That's why am here, to learn to slow down and use this energy creatively I know I can channel it positively. but it's hard, and I feel like I need support to slow down this crazy party.
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