How do I handle this?

[KisstheBull]

Hi, I have made the decision to become a non- drinker. Well, I have discussed this with my husband and he felt he would join me. My husband said that he really did not want to stop before our camping trip with friends the weekend of Sept. 7-9. I said no prob. I decided to stop this past Wed. So last night he became pissed at me when I said I didn't want a drink! He says, I said I wasn't stopping till after the trip. I said fine I feel I NEED to stop now. I really don't think he will have the power to quit. I'm afraid of what may happen to our family if I quit and he dosen't. He is already touchy about discussing giving it up and he pick fights over stupid things also accusing me of "changing".I just don't want to lose my momentum because of his bad attitude towards my decision to start early.

[drinkingal]

How do I handle this?

Kissthebull, I think when both partners drink it does get very complicated and almost co-dependent with the al, but I think what you have to do is just separate your drinking from his, because they aren't one and the same. Tell him you really need to do this for you, and you're not judging him or telling him not to drink but also tell him he is making it harder for you and you want his support. It just sounds like he's finding it a bit threatening maybe?

[KisstheBull]

How do I handle this?

I think you hit the nail on the head when you said he may find this threatening to himself. All of his friends drink heavliy and this change for him is scary. I will explain to him tho that I Do have to do this for me and our family. I hate thinking of all the times our family has had to endure the effects of alcohol on us as parents and our kids seeing it. It's so funny because we seem so normal...funcional alcoholics for sure but now I'm tired of the game, it takes too much energy. The past three mornings I've felt great! I have to remember that feeling. Thanks for your thoughts.

[drinkingal]

How do I handle this?

Good luck KTB, I find when my DH doesn't drink it makes it so much easier for me, and vice versa, so maybe your DH will start to come around when he realises drinking on your own isn't much fun. But I do think you need to have a good talk to him and just try and make him understand and get him on your side so he doesn't sabotage you. He doesn't want to lose his drinking buddy but that's not your problem, you have to do this for yourself.