I greatly appreciated everyones replies to my last thread...it really got me thinking. I saw my boyfriend over the weekend...and just like always, he acts like nothing ever happened. It really hurts to know that he can just pretend like everything is ok when I am literally worrying myself sick over what I can do to save us. I know that there is nothing I can do to make things better...that he needs to want it...but I am starting to wonder if he is just waiting for me to give up. He claims that he does want to be with me & my son and eventually live together as a family, but his actions tell differently. It just seems that he keeps telling me what I want to hear to keep me hanging on long enough to hurt me again. I spoke to him earlier this evening for a few seconds and I could tell that he had been drinking. He said that he was busy at the moment, but he always tries to avoid me to try to hide it. It has been the same vicious cycle over and over again. And eventhough he admits to having a problem and says he wants to get a handle on it..he has made no honest attempts...he just tries a lot harder now to keep it a secret. But I am sure I will get a billigerent call from him by 1am....and he will scream at me and say mean and hurtful things...and tomorrow...he will be sorry and promise to get help..same old..same old...
Am I missing a hint? I have tried to help him and have given him so many chances...but still no changes. Maybe this is a sign that he just really doesn't want to be with me and doesn't want to be the one to break it off. I don't know what to think....
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